The sun will shine again...

Somewhere Over The Rainbow

2011-07-14T22:16:00.002+08:00

Someday... I'll get there... Somehow :)

KFC - Klang Jaya Fried Chicken

2011-07-14T22:07:00.005+08:00

You gotta admit it. EVERYBODY loves fried chicken. Your mom loves fried chicken, your dad loves fried chicken. Even your friends loves fried chicken. Ask any Klangnite and they will tell you Klang Jaya is the Mecca for all fried chicken lovers. In a quaint, old, dark fired chicken corner by the road side in humble Klang Jaya, you will find locals queuing eager to sink their teeth onto the the scrumptious fried chicken. One bite of the tender and juicy fried chicken flesh, you feel on cloud nine you could almost hear the chicken angels singing hymns. The best part is the skin – it is like crispy wafer that melts in your mouth! Crispy haven. Flavourful and nicely marinated, Klang Jaya fried chicken gives KFC a run for its money. What goes well with Klang Jaya fried chicken? Apart from fried chicken they also serve french fries, fried skewers, fried meehoon and red bean soup. Personally I think Coke is your best friend when eating smoking hot fried chicken. Alternatively, 100 plus is great in case you get exhausted from mouth exercises from all the good eats. Another thing you got to love about Klang Jaya fried chicken is the price. For only RM2.40 per piece, your craving for fried chicken as a midnight snack will be satiated. Open from 7 to 11pm daily, the fried chicken stall is run by twin brothers for over 10 years and they sell like hot cakes. If you are lucky, you don’t have to queue to wait for long or worse to find that it is sold out. Other than that, just drive down to the small, modest corner stall at Jalan Selampit 24, Taman Klang Jaya to enjoy Klang’s finger-licking-good fried chicken. Just remember to get your blood pressure and cholesterol level checked the following day!

P/S: This is a very old write up found in my computer. Thought I'd re-live some finger-lickin' good moment! :)

Just Dive!

2010-10-18T21:38:00.006+08:00

[life is too short; take a chance..]

"C'mon you can do this.. I know you can do this.. just R-E-L-A-X"

I picked up the pace as I inhaled and exhaled slowly trying to psyche myself. My breathings were heavy and I was starting to break into cold sweats in my blue tattered borrowed wetsuit. The sight of the sea calmed me and scared me at the same time.

"Hmm.. there is no breeze" my mind wandered off a little bit.

"Whatever you do just stay calm.. it'll be fine.." those words kept echoing in my head.

I accidentally dropped my fins; with those darn heavy air tanks I had to bend over slowly like an 75 years old grandma with severe back osteophorosis trying to pick them up.

"Hey wait up guys!!" I called out to Michelle and Audrey who were ahead of me; also walking like hagged old grandmothers.

"Ouch these rocks are painful!!" I shrieked as my barefoot stepped into the rocky waters. The tides were low you can literally do a feet reflexology by just walking on the marbled pebbles.

Giggles filled the warm sea air as we held on to each other trying to put on our fins. My fins were easier to put on as they were bigger and strapped in easily. Audrey had to struggle to control her balance while putting her fins on as the waves kept pushing us back to shore.

"Ok we have to swim to where the flags are and dive there" Andrea pointed at the orange buoy with red and white flags about 100 metres seaward.

"Alright let's do this! We have been trained to do this" said Michelle behind her fish eyed mask.

Well you think I would flip but I didn't because I have already flipped the day before when Andrea told us to swim from the shore to the boat and back in the middle of the ocean about 100 metres with only our snorkels and fins.

"WHAT?? Are you serious??" I panicked as I never imagined myself ever doing such a thing since the last time I couldn't feel the floor of the swimming pool I nearly drowned.

********

It was back then during my last year in campus where I wanted to do something fun and challenging before I graduate. So I signed up to compete in the inter-college swimming competition. Not much of a regular at the university's public pool nor trained for any such competition, I got listed under 25m breast stroke, freestyle and backstroke.

Then came the day of the competition, all contestant had to get into the middle pool and race to the shallow end.

"Brrrrrrr..." the water was cold and I couldn't feel my feet touching the swimming pool floor.

"Oh shit" I struggled to get to the middle lane where I was stationed to begin. I was already panicking as I couldn't feel the damn floor. The whistle were blown, the race has begin. All the partictpant swam forward to the finish line.

"Gasp!!" I took a deep breather and kicked as hard forward. But I wasn't moving. I began to sink. I kicked and I kicked but water kept gushing down my nostrils and my throat. In all attempts failed I raised my hands in the air and signal: I wanted out. Noticing my drowning gestures a random guy nearly wanted to jump into the water to save me but held back. However I did hear him telling his friends; " I think she can swim wan lah.." So finally nobody came to my rescue instead they all cheered me to the end the race. Determined, I swam slowly to the finish line. Even then all my hands and legs coordinations were wrong, even my breathing. I frantically struggled to keep my head in the air but still kept drinking chlorined-water.

Once reached the finish line, everybody roared with cheer for me. For the first time I felt the spirit of sportmanship as well as sheer embarassment. Later an announcements was made at the loud speaker: "partictpants for the next rounds please FINISH your race and what ever you do, do not stop swimming.." Oh how embarassing!! I quickly dried off and cancelled my other two swimming contests.

*******************

The sea breeze slapped me back to reality and the old washed-down wooden boat in the middle of the ocean caught my attention once again.

Turning towards Andrea again in desperation; "Wait, are you really serious?? I thought we already did the swim test yesterday?? Hoping that she was just kiddng but looking at a straight-faced Andrea I knew she was dead serious.

"No that was just floating in the pool for 10 minutes, you can do this.. plus I need to make sure you guys could at least swim to the boat and back to shore without any problems.. No worries I will keep an eye on you"

"OH-MY-GAWD"

Took us forever even to manouver ourselves on the peebled-rock beach to the ocean. And a whole load of fear.

One step two step.

"Just put your head and snorkel in the water and just paddle your fins." Michelle assured.

We donned our masked and snorkel and took a deep breath into the waters. The first thing I saw underwater was sea urchins. Never seen one before. Black and prickly. Long black prickles. Scared and curious at the same time. They had shiny dots that looks like eyes and red circles resemble mouth-like shape.

"Oh look at how cute they are especially their faces they look like cartoons. Oh my god there are tonnes of the down there!! Stay calm. Just keep swimming.. just keep swimming..."

The sea water makes you really buoyant so there was no need for a life jacket. With just a pair of fins, a mask and a snorkel; we swam our ways towards the boat. It was funny as although we were heading to one point but the fact was we were all over the place! Audrey swam super fast (betcha she could beat any Olympics' records!) and did not look up while I tailed behind. And Michelle tried to group us together.

Of course I was chicken scared. Well the thought of swiming into the unknown can be really scary. But after awhile the corals and fishes under does take our mind off the fact that you are in the middle of ocean with just flippers and a snorkel. Next thing you know we were swimming back to shore. Audrey was first (can you believe that??), Michelle second while I was last (really enjoying the swim slash snorkel) to arrive to shore. This too could be similar to a personality question once asked by a potential employer i.e. why do people climb mountains? My answer was; to enjoy the view (hah!). Yeah right enjoy the view. Susah-susah saja kan climb mountain? But after asking a few other people who gave a more thoughtful answers like; "to have a sence of achievement" I came to a conclusion that I'm a person who very much enjoys the process rather than achieving the goal (what's wrong with me??).

"I still can't believe we finally made it alive outta that!! Woohoo!!" There was a sense of achieving something. My fear of drowning, the deep ocean, and ultimately.. the unknown. Funny thing we never expected that to learn diving would be so streanous and stressfull. Initially Audrey even thought that she had actually signed up for a relaxing holiday. But talk about battling for our survival everytime we go into the waters! Ok it might sound exaggerating but that was exactly how it felt at that time.

Finally the time has come. To practise our skills in the sea. After the warm up we had the day before; swimming to and from the boat, this time we swam again to the orange buoy in the sea. Andrea had explained she wants us to do the mask skills i.e. filling up our masks with water and blast it out about 9 meters at the bottom of the ocean. As for me I really REALLY dreaded the mask skills. Never liked water getting in my mask. Stings my eyes plus goes up to my nose. Never liked it at all. So I had this paranoia water will get into my mask, I will breathe the water right up to my nose, choke and drown under water.

"Everybody ready??" Andrea signalled thumbs down for descend. Breathing like Darth Vader through the regulator, I took a deep breathe and slowly sink down to the ocean floor while deflating my BCD.

The way down was a slow and gradual descent. Had to equalize our ear pressure all the way till we reach the bottom of the ocean. Took us awhile to stabilize ourselves at the bottom. We were on our knees waiting for Audrey to park herself next to us in time for the underwater skill test. The ever dreadful mask skill.

As I was waiting for everyone I kept fidgitting with my mask. Pulling and tighthening the straps for the fear that water might seep in and fill up my mask. And suddenly I heard a snap. Oh my Lord, to my worst nightmare, the mask strap actually snapped! I could only held on to my strap and mask. Bottomline is I sabotaged myself. Frantically I tried to call the instructor who had her back facing me so obviously she couldn't see what was going on. Stretched out my hands to her but she was out of reach. I couldn't speak nor make a sound. I was already picturing the worse that was about to happen (i.e. dead/drown) then I remember to stay calm and signal for trouble. I quickly signalled Michelle next to me that my mask is NO GOOD. Took her awile to figure out what happened and she signalled Andrea towards me and I showed her my mask that gave way but still held it tightly towards my face. Lord, I could never imagined what would happen if the mask totally came off my face. Within seconds we ascended to surface and had my mask strap fixed. To my surprise it got fixed and I wasn't too delighted as I knew I had to go down and do it mask skills
anyhow. Dang!

Again we had to descent to the sea floor. Sea cucumbers bounced off the ground as we touched down. One-by-one each had to do the mask skills and it was my turn. Took in deep breaths trying to calm myself down. Seeing my instructor signaling it's time, I closed my eyes, took out the mask and quickly pinch my nose before the water could get in (a tip Andrea taught me). The whole time I pinched my nose and breathed through the regulator. Then I held my breath, let go my nose and hurriedly put the mask back on. Blasted the water off
my mask and task done. I was still alive. My eyes did sting but I was just so glad to have completed the skills test, even after all the drama. We swam a little and resurfaced. And that was my first experience diving.

Hell it was scary but the chance to be even enjoy the view underwater is just breathtaking. It was like being in an alien planet with magnificent creatures. Everything felt so SURREAL underwater. My aunt and I always argue about diving. My arguement has always been; "the world is made of 70% water.. imagine what you have not discovered". Cliche. I know. Other than that I think the rich-compressed-air really makes you feel good. Not nitrogen narcossis. The deep controlled breathing underwater and nice slow swims with awesome view of colourful fishes is just pure bliss.

They say there are 2 types of divers; one who takes their license and never dive again and the other; hooked to diving! I think I'm the latter. However I still have fears and paranoia. And the fact that I still swim like a seahorse. But the only way to overcome your fear is to actually do it! After my license in March, I went to Tenggol in April (they have the best isolated beaches great for honeymoon!) and Tioman again in May. I have seen turtles and the best part a 1.5m white reef shark in Tioman! So far counting: 11 dives and definitely many many more to go.

After my worse nightmare I'm still happily diving! Well as long as I don't have to do mask skills!

Moral of the story: buy a good mask.

Next thing to do: get an underwater camera!

Getting there

2010-05-26T23:32:00.009+08:00

Look ma I'm on TV (but gosh why am I squinting??)

Doing a live crossover with the main studio.

Note to self:

1. Sit up straight

2. Less hand movement (apparently my hands moved too much thus a bit distracting)

3. Put on more make up

4. Wardrobe makeover

5. Loose weight (it's true you look 10 pounds fatter on TV!)

6. Use proper BM (no matter what!)

7. Controlled speech

8. Smile (play with facial expressions)

9. R-E-L-A-X

10. Enjoy the adrenaline!

Life!

2010-05-26T23:30:00.000+08:00

Bicara Pungguk Dan Bulan

2010-03-27T19:44:00.005+08:00

Pungguk:

Bagaikan pungguk rindukan bulan, bulan yang kejauhan,

bagaimana harus ku luahkan, rindu yang terpahat di hatiku..

Umpama diriku, merinduimu dikejauhan,

ku hanya bisa berharap bisikan bayu malam membawa rinduku kepadamu..

Bulan:

Mana kan sanggup daku mendengar rintihan gelora jiwa di kejauhan,

walau jarak memisahkan kita..

Namun ku terus memancar cahaya,

hanya untuk menyinari gelita kerinduanmu..

Pungguk:

Tetapi apakan daya, hanya rindu dan rintihan menemaniku setiap malam.

Tatkala sinaranmu menerangi kegelapan, gelap gelita hidupku tanpamu.

Oh bulan, terangilah malamku..

Agar ku dapat menatap wajahmu, memerhatikanmu dari kejauhan,

sebelum mentari datang, mengembalikan kesunyian di jiwa si pungguk..

Bulan:

Wahai pungguk gemala jiwa,

Dapat ku rasakan betapa sucinya hatimu,

betapa luhurnya perasaanmu, betapa dalamnya rindumu,

dan betapa seksanya deritamu..

Selagi akan ada malam, selama itu aku menyinarimu,

tanpa henti, tanpa penat, tanpa jemu..

Biarpun masa berlalu, musim berganti, zaman berubah,

takkan ku biar sunyi menghinggapi jiwamu hingga ke akhirnya...

Kokopelli

2010-03-03T12:12:00.002+08:00

they make me feel young all the time ;-)

Just Me!

2010-01-11T23:24:00.003+08:00

i ♥ polaroid effects that i painstakingly editted it myself :P

New Year's Resolution. Gah!

2010-01-03T11:39:00.010+08:00

Ok supposed I didn't have any New Year's Resolutions. Yada yada yada. I've said it tonnes of times. No thanks to Fadzli, I'm inspired to list down my very own. I'm such a lalang I know. So here goes..

To a more happy and carefree life!

1. Diet starts TODAY!

Enough said.

2. Hit the gym often

Exercise regularly to work and tone the body (not just to exercise the eyes!)

3. Salsa!

Almost forgotten how much fun it was after not doing it for some time.. need to add more "attitude" and groove into it. Pick up more styling and confidence! Might consider taking up Zouk dance cos its oh-so-hawt!!

4. Travel

Next destination: Bandung <3

5. Pick up new hobbies

Hiking, scuba diving & muay thai (doesn't hurt to know how to kick @$$)

6. Read more

I have been buying too many books and have yet to read them. Need to find time to read.. preferably by the beach!

7. Write a book: Fat and Fabulous!

Just kidding. But I do want to write more creative pieces. Short stories perhaps? But first I need to close my eyes and go to a happy place. Zzzz...

8. Explore new opportunities

Hoping for a career change. Perhaps a job that pays more? Tired of being broke bah.

9. Be more courageous and less shy

I mean what is there to lose right? Be it in interpersonal relations or trying new things. Step out from comfort zone and just do it! One who hesitates is lost. Try everything (or everyone) at least once!

10. Search myself

Practice #9 and I will find #10

P/S: there are 2 aspects; financial and time management that I resolved not to resolve as it is and will be a perpetual dilemma. I need professional help.

SO what's your New Year Resolution?? It's ok to NOT have one. But it's kinda fun though.

Goodbye 2009.. Hello 2010!!

2010-01-01T14:30:00.007+08:00

Day 1 of 2010:

Actually I did not plan to have any new year's resolution this year. My new year's resolution is.. I will have NO new year's resolution! Gah. Knowing me, I constantly need a reminder. Even have lists of things to do on my mobile phone otherwise will procrastinate till God knows when.

So here are just 3 things I hope for this year (yay, I love doing lists!):

1. To be in better shape.. anything but round

2. To have a career change (for the better) *fingers crossed*

3. To be happy.. even though single!

I would say I had a fair share of fun in 2009. It would surprise me to hear people lamented that it was a bad year.. for me it was just as good. Even better than my previous years I would say. A lot has happened over the year; had to get used to mom being away so long and so far for work, me moving out to a new place in KL, my first debut in performing arts for KLPAC's Short+Sweet competition, attended numerous auditions just to explore oneself and of course met many wonderful people along the way..

Wow I think 2009 should be named "My Debut Year". Last July during my cousin's wedding it was also my debut performance, a duet song with my cousin, Philip. Just like when we were kids we liked to sing in front of our relatives and play the back-then-famous reality singing competition, Asia Bagus. Well I guess all that training paid well. My cousin leads vocals for his band and as for me, well.. I love to sing in the showers!

Speaking of debuting, 25 May 2009 also marked history as my first debut on TV as a sidekick in a live talk show on RTM called Di Luar Lingkungan. Though it was only 5 minutes of fame, I enjoyed every minute of it. Till that day I have been hoping and still hope I get to do more of it. More of TV I supposed. When will my next opportunity be? On the downside, 2009 have been the most attempt at auditions and resumes I have ever had or sent and they have all return void. But that doesn't mean I will give up, NOOO! Come 2010, things are going to be different I hope. I pray for a better career that will take me to greater heights so I can do more and achieve more.

For I know the plans I have for you," declares the LORD,

"plans to prosper you and not to harm you,

plans to give you hope and a future.

-- Jeremiah 29:11.

Apart from that, 2009 has also been an award winning year for me. Well it was awarded for my works I did in 2008 but of course presented the following year; Ministry of Health and from Bernama itself. It was literally one after another. After having received award for Best Health Radio Program that night, the next morning it was Best Radio Broadcasting Award. Double happiness! And recently just last October after having completed the International Journalism Fellowship (IJF) with a bunch of vivacious people across the globe, being awarded the best local participant was really the icing on top! Oh how I miss my IJF mates!! They really added colour and life into my year end. Can't wait to see them in Bandung this year!!

Deep down in my heart I KNOW that 2010 will be a good year (at least that's what I really hope for).. not to mention my birthday even falls this year on 10.10.10!! That is awesome right?? So it's gotta mean something.. Can hardly wait to see what's in store this fabulous year!!

Happy New Year everyone!!

"No eye has seen,

no ear has heard,

no mind has conceived

what God has prepared for those who love him"

-- 1 Corinthians 2:9.

Addicted To Kolok Mee

2009-11-16T18:53:00.010+08:00

A bowl of scrumptious kolok mee bound to tantalize all of your senses!

"Slurp!"

"God this is delicious!" I thought to myself as I took another mouthful of the springy noodle drenched in fragrant oil.

On the table there was silence. Just the sounds of chopsticks clanged with the porcelain bowl.

Meanwhile in my mouth, there was an orchestra of flavours. Springy noodle. Sweet juicy roast pork – all begging to invade my senses and bring me to a who le new world of satisfaction.

Topped up with crispy minced meat, mixed together in savoury lard. Simply marvellous!

Within minutes, all that was left is the greasy bowl and a smile of sheer delight on my face.

"I just love to cook", she smiled when asked why she did it.

"The secret recipe is the lard. And garlic oil. Those were the most important ingredients for kolok mee" Anna Ng says with much pride in front of her stall at the corner lot shop along the streets of Kuching.

"I have tried others and made my own research on how to cook a delicious kolok mee", she said. And she should know, as she has been in business selling the beloved local dish for the past four years.

"I usually fry the garlic combined with lard and that makes the noodles so fragrant. The chopped meat is maintained to its original taste."

"Therefore my noodles taste different from others. And many of my customers like it."

Kolok Mee is a type of noodle dish commonly found in Kuching, Sarawak.

"Kolok" in the local Hokkien dialect describes the method of the noodle is being cooked.

Springy egg noodle blanched in hot water that looks like instant noodle and served in lard with some condiments like sliced pork and minced meat. It is served throughout the day – for breakfast, lunch and even supper!

Kolok mee resembles wantan mee which is popular in the Peninsula, but with an oomph to it!

The difference between the two however, is that kolok mee is not drenched in dark soy sauce and water is not added to the noodles when served. The helping of noodles also does not come with wantan. Instead, there is minced pork together with slices of roast pork or char siew.

Kolok mee comes in two common flavours; plain or seasoned with red sauce. Either way they taste just as good! Not to mention it is reasonably cheap too. A dish can cost anywhere between three and four ringgit. Cheap, delicious and amazingly satisfying. What more can you ask for?

Since Kuching has a sizeable Chinese population especially of Hakka and Hokkien descent, kolok mee is very much entrenched in the food culture here.

To suit the local Muslim community, the kolok mee is even replaced with strips of chicken instead of pork. That way everybody gets to savour the local delight.

For John Lister Chan, 31, kolok mee reminds him of home.

Thus, whenever he leaves town, the first thing he would look for upon returning to Kuching is kolok mee.

"Because it is our hometown's special dish. You can't find it anywhere. It is famous here in Kuching", he gushes on as he shared about why he loves the dish.

"Kolok mee is our traditional food. Therefore the government should promote this dish as our local pride before it is forgotten”, he laments.

"Kolok mee has a history of many years but nowadays the locals tends to switch to other foods such as dimsum"

For every cat you see in the city, there you will find kolok mee. Literally, everywhere around the city. It is undoubtedly everybody's favourite traditional dish.

However it is more than just a hearty bowl of noodles. It is close to the hearts of many locals. To them that is where home is. This simple yet delightful dish does not just bridge the local community but has even got me, a non-local, caught up in its craze.

“A bowl of kolok mee please?”, I smile to the lady standing behind the stall. I watch her prepare the meal as she places the sliced roast pork on top of the noodles.

My memories took me back to 3 years ago. That was the last time I had kolok mee. It was love at first bite. And that was all I have been thinking of since my recent flight to the city of cats.

Anna brought the dish before me. My nose tingled as I caught a whiff of the rich aromatic smell. I delightedly picked up the chopsticks and mixed the noodles together with all the accompaniments inside the bowl, blending them together to a perfect harmony. I took a mouthful of it. And another. And another..

Ever since then, I have been having them for 3 consecutive days. And I’m not even complaining. Why? Because I simply just can’t get enough of it!"

Puppy Brown Eyes

2009-11-06T20:55:00.004+08:00

He held my hand. His fingers entwined with mine.
Shy. I pulled away.
My mind went ahead of me.
He's just fooling with me, I thought.
So I pushed him away.
After dinner with the rest, he held on to me tightly asking me to stay.
I wriggled my arms from his hold.
I walked away.
Was I too much? I was quite flattered I must say.
He's adorable and I liked him.
But it's not possible. We are not possible.
I'm afraid he even thinks that I was into girls!
Cos I was hanging out more with them.
But the facts is, I'm in love with those puppy brown eyes.

The Other Woman

2009-10-07T17:36:00.002+08:00

“You think I didn’t know what you were doing? Late nights, drunk, smelling of women.”

He just walked in the door, ignoring the screams of his wife.

He placed his brown leather bag down on the sofa and starts to unbutton his shirt.

“You were with that woman huh??” She grabbed his shirt violently, inspecting the fabric and demanded an explanation.

One hand on her waist.. “I smell female perfume.. How could you do this to me?? I‘ve been with you for 10 years!! And our children??”

Two little girls in their pyjamas, quietly sitting at the staircase. The smallest one hugged her doll tightly as her sister held her and they both started crying.

He just ignored her. Nothing came out of his mouth. As he sits down and flicked through the channels on the remote control.

She began to loose control as she rummaged through his leather bag. Papers flying across the room.

“What are you doing?? Are you out of your mind??” He stood up and his held on to the bag.

“HAH! What’s this you bloody bastard?!?” She held a black pantyhose right in front of his face.

“Tell me who’s that slut?? What does she has that I don’t have??”

“I’ve been wanting to tell you if you weren’t so crazy woman..”

“These pantyhose are mine..” he snatched them back. Later he held out a bright pink wig from his bag.

“Don’t worry honey. There is no other woman. He’s my ex-boss.”

Her jaws dropped as her knees weaken and like a feather she allowed gravity to pull her to the sofa.

He then placed the wig over his head, turned around and walk towards the door. He swayed his hips as he walked out the door with HER red heels.

Dreaming Of A Dream

2009-10-07T17:33:00.008+08:00

The clock on the wall shows it’s quarter to 5pm. 15 minutes seems like forever. Just as I was about to finish the last sentence of my report, he gives me another file to process.

“What the hell? I was already packing my bag and ready to go home for dinner with family.”

His seems to be mumbling though I can’t make sense of what he is saying as my gaze moved to a picture of a pristine beach stuck on my cubicle wall.

“Boy, can I have a glass of cold Pina Colada? I asked the shirt-less waiter who was holding a tray of drinks near the beach benches.

“Yes madam..” He replied as I put on my sunglasses and continued with the book that I was reading.

The salty sea breeze kissed my skin and the hammock moved along with the wind.

The sound of waves and birds chirping were so soothing that it made my eyelids grew heavier.

“I am freezing ALL your annual leaves as we are short of staffs this month. I understand you applied for leave the next 5 days but we are going to have to freeze those days honey. Sorry..”

“OH NOOOO…… I have already booked my holiday in Redang!!!”

“Madam.. Are you alright? Here’s your Pina Colada.”

“Oh thank you.”

Wow what kind of nasty dream was that? I shrugged it away as I sipped from my drink and continued my book. The wind blew even stronger.. I lost balance and my hammock overturned.

“BUMMP!!” I hit my bum on the floor..

“WHAT ARE YOU DOING ON THE FLOOR??” my boss asked.

“Oh I’m sorry.. What were you saying Sir?”

“I said you leaves have been frozen. You will work extra hours from now onwards!!”

“No extra claims. Think of it as for your personal development. Since you are still new, it’s good for the big boss to see you working hard.”

The clock shows 5.05pm. Oh well there goes my dinner plans.

Season of Loneliness

2009-09-19T21:37:00.007+08:00

At this moment here are 3 people I missed the most; momsie dearest, salsa boy and my super bubbly ex-housemate. Now that they are not around, life does seemed a little dull, boring and yes, lonely.

There’s this movie coming up, The Ugly Truth. I don’t know with whom to watch it with. Need somebody to cuddle with and share a box of popcorn, while laughing out loud in the movies (the last time I laughed so hard I cried was Kung Fu Panda). My favorite romantic-mushy-movie-kaki has already promised her church friends she’d watch it with them. It’s been awhile since I have been in the company of familiar faces. Somebody I can really connect with and just rant about my day at work and frustrations. At the moment blogging about them will just do. Not many people really listen nowadays. The last time I remembered it does feels good to have somebody to just listen to you. Take in all your crappy jokes and lameness. Sigh where are all my friends? They must be busy I think. Can’t rely on others to make myself happy. It’s only me, myself and I.

You don’t really know how much someone means to you until they are gone. It is when you really missed them and think about them everyday. Life feels different when they leave. Or maybe I’m just too used to them, it’s taking some time to adjust. But why is it taking so long? Ouch. Didn’t really appreciate my housemate until she left. Every night she would be the first person to greet me “Hello, How are you?“ with a bright smile as I enter the door. Always cheerful and happy, we’d share our stories at the doorsteps of our rooms. She’s quite a hyper one I tell you. Each night the other roommate will be far asleep in La-La Land while we were still up in the late night laughing away at our silly jokes and games. Nowadays I come home to emptiness and quietness.

Mom has always been always my comfort and joy. Truly the home is where the heart is. Where mom is, that’s home. What huge sacrifice a mother has to make to be apart from family and loved ones just to earn a better living. A mother that provides only what’s best for her children. Never thinking of herself but always putting others first. Mom, you are my hero!

Losing a companion is just as equally as bad. Somebody who is up for just about anything. Someone just as adventurous and like-minded, whom you feel connected somehow. We can just talk about anything (even about boys!), often having deep discussions over supper. What I’d miss most is about his absolutely funny and random remarks (and sometimes actions). During dance night outs he’d comment about how hot or sexy I looked and notices the clothes and accessories I wear. And I liked that. He’s such a fun guy. When we salsa or dance, nothing else matters, it’s just having the great chemistry on the dance floor and I feel most comfortable to slut-dance with him. He’s also someone whom I can pseudo-flirt and ask out for movies/dancing/dinner/theater/shopping/events/just-about-anything! So far I think he’s the only one who fits the jacket. But of course he had to return back to homeland for good and it was goodbye from him.

So.. life goes on. Like it or not, I have to pick up the pieces and move forward. But at the mean time I’d prefer to be left alone reminiscing the good times. I guess I could also use some hug.

Seducing Mr. Perfect

2009-08-23T00:11:00.007+08:00

Hubba hubba

There's this guy. To me he's just perfect. He cooks, bakes, does house chores and loves kids. Best part is, I can totally imagine myself with him because he knows me well and accepts me for who I am. The lame-ness and airhead-ness that is me. There's definitely chemistry as we could talk and engage of different levels of discussion. He'd listen to my funny stories and we'd have a good laugh.

He's my Oracle. Gives me directions on the road as well as in life. Not to mention he's also charming, smart, opinionated, outgoing, spontaneous and funny. Like me, he loves to travel, loves food and loves love.

A gentleman like him is hard to find. Opens the door for me. Prepares me food and there was once he even grinded the pepper onto my meal which drew envy from another table next to us. He treats me like a princess. Held my hands when crossing the street. Made me felt safe. Well not that I'm insecure of anything, but it sure felt nice!

His parents? They simply adore me! His mom even suggested him to marry me. Well I always knew I'm a good daughter-in-law material. Which I actually don't mind. Tall, nice bod, has career, car, cash. You name it! Indeed an eligible bachelor. Ok maybe a wee bit too old for that. Men of his age would have a teenage kid by now. But that's not a problem to me. Men tend to look better as they age, unlike women.

However there just seems to be only ONE problem. Mr.Perfect is not available (well most of the time they aren't anyway). Not in a million years. At least not for me.

Unfortunately, he has a boyfriend.

Now how can I compete with THAT???

S+S Experience

2009-08-09T02:13:00.010+08:00

With awesome dancers, Suhaili and Weijun!

Gala night was great although we didn't win anything (except for our fellow dancer, Suhaili which took home the award for best female dancer for Shades Of The Moon, and best choreographer AND best production for her other piece, Nerds Gone Nuts. Yeah the woman is multi-talented. However I guess Weijun was more disappointed due to the feedback we got from some audience that our dance was rather "artsy". Apparently not many people actually understood the piece. Deeming it as too "deep". Well I guess that's the challenge of being too artistic when the audiences are not. Sometimes you need not crack your head too much to solve the mystery, but just enjoy the art as it is. At the very least for its aesthetic value. Well that's what I think. Art (even paintings in art galleries) always leaves room for personal interpretations.

The art of lights, sound and movements perhaps?

Oh well whatever is it for me, I'm very much happy with the outcome. For me it was the whole experience, the whole package. Since I had no dancing background whatsoever (except salsa) and I just wanted a stage to perform. And the fact that I was an outcast (as nobody actually picked my during the auditions) but Weijun took me in. He told me that everybody who auditioned should deserve a chance and for that I'm just so grateful. Being in the gala night itself was such an honour. And for me working with such professionals like Weijun and Suhaili, I couldn't ask for more as I learnt so many things from them, besides getting to meet new people. Truly, I'm very much inspired by all these talented dancers. They have the talents, the commitment and most importantly the passion to dance!

My debut performance in "Shades Of The Moon". And that my friend, is the block.

Most of the time backstage, I would feel so small and insignificant compared to others in the Short+Sweet Dance. I understand that some of the dancers were trained ballerinas from the age of 5! Others could do headstands, splits, flips, twirls and stunts almost effortlessly which I could only dream of doing. Therefore, I'm only good at what I do, which is the choreography on the block. Oh but it was just so inspiring to see them dance nevertheless! It felt just like in the movies (being backstage) but lesser dramas of course. Dancers getting ready warming up before the show as my nerve creeps up!

Adrenaline pumping 10 minutes before show. From the backstage monitoring screen we could see the audiences as they enter the hall and fill up the seats. The stage manager cues us and the show begins! Nothing else that went through my mind as I stepped up the block and do my 'thang. In mind, all I could think of was "I just needed to get it right, every step, don't screw up!" And add in some soul to each choreographed step (which am still figuring out how!).

Auww.. Backstage with The Moonies.

I'm also thankful I didn't have any wardrobe malfunction the whole time we were on stage as it was just a thinly-strapped white baby doll dress clinging over my shoulders. Thankfully nothing snapped, otherwise it would ended up as a peek-a-boo show! And the white dress I got from Times Square, oh it was just perfect and cheap!

Dressing room 2 : Moons + Nerds + Mamis!

What also made the whole experience most memorable was sharing the same dressing room with a crazy bunch of people, Nerds Gone Nut and Mami Jarum. They are just hilarious! We would laugh our heads off watching Little Rascals together in the dressing room backstage while getting ready for the show. Plus having Fuzzy together in the same competition and same dressing room is just the cherry on top! I think we were destined to get into it together, we auditioned together, we got in together and share the same dressing room together! Although for different dance pieces. But it was fun to have him around and he's such a sweetheart for doing my hair every night before the show! Apparently he had always had a dormant passion for hairstyling since childhood! Just missing was a make up artist!

My hairstylist, Fadzli. Thanks dude for doing my hair!

All in all, it was a wonderful experience for me as I will surely not forget my debut dance performance (not to mention artistic dance!). Besides, I don't know when will I have a chance to do it again. I must say the timing was just perfect. If it was any bigger production I wouldn't have the time to commit due to my work schedules. Indeed it the experience was Short+Sweet!

Shades Of The Moon

2009-08-04T16:50:00.003+08:00

We got into Gala Night! :)

Something Beautiful

2009-07-22T18:40:00.005+08:00

Over garlic cheese naan at Uma Rani last night we were discussing about the full dressed rehersals of Short+Sweet we watched earlier in KLPAC. Talking about which dance pieces we prefer the most and dancing experiences.

Wei Jun has been dancing all his life. When I asked him how many years has he been dancing he replied, "I don't know.. It's like asking me since when did I learn to eat, or speak, or walk!"

So I asked him, "Well do you know WHY I joined Short+Sweet?"

He just shook his head.

"I just wanted to see what I can do.. I've always wanted to perform on stage. It was something that I wanted to do for so long that I have somewhat forgotten about it. There was an audition so I jumped straight into it!"

"Besides.. I want to be a part of something beautiful."

Well some deep discussions over roti naan going on there!

Personally I'm doing this for myself. To build my confidence on stage and just to have fun. For somebody with so little dance background (previously I danced only salsa okay!), I realized that for a simple choreography, there were so many thing that took place behind the scenes.

Ever since day 1 of my rehersals with Wei Jun, my steps have evolved to something different each time. But thankfully he was ever so patient and accomodating. Never asked me to do something that I can't pull off well. Truly an honour to work with such a professional.

Anyway can't wait to see the full dance being put together soon. It's definitely going to be short+sweeeeeet!!! That's a guarantee.

So come one, come all to watch me perform this 29th July to 1st August at KLPAC!

Look ma I'm on TV!

2009-06-14T17:45:00.009+08:00

25th May 2009 marks history in my life...

Finally my first TV appearance on RTM!! It's a 4 minutes slot featuring me as the host's sidekick.

All in all the experience was great! First time standing in front of a camera live and giving a presentation. Initially, I thought my nerves would tear me apart. As I've known, no matter how GOOD you are, if you can't control your nerves, you're totally screwed! Of course, there was an auto-queue where you can read your text (you can't be memorizing ALL of it right??). I guess I was focusing way too much on reading my queue right, I completely forgotten about my nervousness! In fact, it turned out to be a FUN experience. I actually kinda enjoyed it. Adrenaline rush? You betcha!

I was reminded of what some people had told me before: "If you are too nervous to read news on RADIO, what makes you think you'd be better on TV??" -- well let's hope and pray this opens up more doors so I can prove them otherwise!

Life is a climb, but the view is great!

P/S: My slot is somewhat during the 3rd or 4th minute into the show, and somewhere in the middle and the end. Best way to view the video is to wait for it to upload completely. Buffering might take some time. Therefore a good internet connection is needed.

Enjoy! :)

Di Luar Lingkungan Bersama Sayed Munawar (25 Mei 2009)Video:

Tajuk : Pendidikan Politik : Matangkah Pemikiran Politik Malaysia Tetamu : 1) YB YUSMADI YUSOFF Ahli Parlimen Balik Pulau 2) PROF. MADYA DR. AHMAD NIZAMUDDIN SULAIMAN Pensyarah Kanan Sains Politik & Strategik, UKM 3) AMER SAIFUDE GHAZ

Click here:

http://link.brightcove.com/services/player/bcpid10791406001?bclid=11619770001&bctid=25616613001

In Need Of A New Retrospection

2009-05-18T14:17:00.004+08:00

My perpetual dilemma of facing frustrations and disappointments from chasing dreams.. Sigh. When will it stop?? I'm really tired already... However the Oracle has spoken today:

I need a new retrospection. I need to move forward. Move on. But I'm lost. I need guidance. Help!

Lemons

2009-05-04T01:22:00.005+08:00

"When life hands you lemons, make lemonade."

So the saying goes. But why settle for making lemonade when there are so many more possibilities?

When life hands you lemons...

* Cut them in half and squeeze the stinging, citrus pulp into the eyes of those who would dare to mock, threaten or oppose you.

* Just as life hands them to you, quickly toss them back. Yell, "You touched 'em last!" Then run away.

* Make lemon meringue pie.

* Sell 'em lemons to Breeze, they can make lemon smelling detergent.

* Juggle.

* Bleach your face with homemade lemon mask.

* Make lemonade. Add vodka. Drink. Declare that "life ishn't scho bad after all."

* Throw them back and say, "I want apples! Gimme apples!"

* Lemon fight!

* Simply refuse to sign for them. Life's lemons can't be delivered without an authorized signature.

* Pretend to "accidentally" drop one of them. When life bends over to pick it up, give life a major wedgie. Run away (without the lemons, of course.)

* Share them. Sharing is caring.

* Accept them graciously, so as not to cause life to suspect you of anything. Then stick one in life's exhaust pipe while it's in the grocery store picking up more lemons.

But hey, what if life hands you TOMATOES??? Make Bloody Marys. Cheers!

Hunkalicious!

2009-05-02T16:57:00.002+08:00

Henry Golding, CLEO's Most Eligible Bachelor 2009 (hubba hubba)

Henry doing a sexy dance. Very sexy.

The Forer Effect

2009-05-02T15:51:00.008+08:00

You have a need for other people to like and admire you, and yet you tend to be critical of yourself (yes I'm very critical indeed - I am my own worst enemy)
While you have some personality weaknesses you are generally able to compensate for them.
You have considerable unused capacity that you have not turned to your advantage (I feel I have so much to offer so much I can give.. but I don't know how to channel them)
Disciplined and self-controlled on the outside, you tend to be worrisome and insecure on the inside (I think too much sometimes, contrary to popular beliefs)
At times you have serious doubts as to whether you have made the right decision or done the right thing (A true Libran, "indecisive" is my middle name, depending on the situation.. once decided I can be rather stubborn at times)
You prefer a certain amount of change and variety and become dissatisfied when hemmed in by restrictions and limitations (hell yeah.. I'll rot at my desk by doing a 9-5 job!)
You also pride yourself as an independent thinker; and do not accept others' statements without satisfactory proof (critical, analytical and skeptical, that's me!)
But you have found it unwise to be too frank in revealing yourself to others (only when it is safe to come out)
At times you are extroverted, affable, and sociable, while at other times you are introverted, wary, and reserved (can't agree more.. bi-polar personality maybe?)
Some of your aspirations tend to be rather unrealistic (you mean like reading the news? yeah tell me about it!)

This quiz asks a few questions and generates a passage that describes you almost perfectly. It was first created by Dr. Forer in 1948 and has been used thousands of times since then. On average, it is accurate 4.2 out of 5 times!

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Forer_effect

Oh The Irony!

2009-04-26T00:08:00.005+08:00

What is winning 2 awards in a row (literally one day after another) but you still can't read the news? By right one should be happy that it is a personal milestone especially in my budding career. Definitely a great honour receiving the awards alongside established journalists of much longer experience and seniority. But again the heart is not at peace. In fact in pieces. Nothing else matters when you can't read the news. The passion in everything else just died off. Sigh.

My Theme Song: The Climb by Miley Cyrus

2009-04-15T13:03:00.002+08:00

I can almost see it

That dream I'm dreaming but

There's a voice inside my head sayin,

You'll never reach it,

Every step I'm taking,

Every move I make feels

Lost with no direction

My faith is shaking but I

Got to keep trying

Got to keep my head held high

There's always going to be another mountain

I'm always going to want to make it move

Always going to be an uphill battle,

Sometimes I'm gonna to have to lose,

Ain't about how fast I get there,

Ain't about what's waiting on the other side

It's The Climb

The struggles I'm facing,

The chances I'm taking

Sometimes they knock me down but

No I'm not breaking

I mean I know it

But these are the moments that

I'm going to remember most yeah

Just got to keep going

And I, I got to be strong

Just keep pushing on...

There's always going to be another mountain

I'm always going to want to make it move

Always going to be an uphill battle,

Sometimes I'm gonna to have to lose,

Ain't about how fast I get there,

Ain't about what's waiting on the other side

It's the climb

Keep on moving

Keep climbing

Keep the faith baby

It's all about

The climb

Keep the faith

Keep your faith...

little.black.book

2009-04-08T17:23:00.008+08:00

Knew about the boutique for some time now. Finally had a chance to take a peek at what's in store (in Bangsar). Boy, it was love at first sight! Only I had the moolahs to splurge! The clothes are so colourful, chic and hip. So me! I love their dresses and cute unique outfits. Especially with lots of colour, psychedelic and the bohemian/retro chick look. And they are so affordable! Some of the cute stuffs that caught my eyes. My wish list (well sorta):

Cute and very Gossip Girl indeed. Dress at only RM49.90!

Sweet and sexy alluring dress! Very Hawaiian me likey much! It's so afforable.. Only RM32.90!

I so want this! Cute kitty cat top only RM32.90!

Oh their party dresses are to-die-for! Especially the satin dresses. Sexy but not skanky. Too many caught my eyes but I can't possibly post it here. I think I may have promoted the store a bit too much. Since I don't get any commision so I'll just stop here and view the rest at http://littleblackbookmy.blogspot.com/

Sunday Morning

2009-04-02T22:45:00.001+08:00

Suddenly I felt like going to church.. But somehow or rather I doubt the sudden "burst of faith" at this point, as I have not been attending for about a year now & SUDDENLY, I want to go..

I guess I'm just lost and I need guidance..

In times of crisis, I find the issue of "God" somehow becomes very relevant. I thought I could be a somebody, meant to do great things, write my own destiny.. but turns out I failed. I'm just a nobody. I have failed and it's hard to swallow. Especially to find out that something you are so passionate about, just crumble right in front of you. Stripped and thrown out to face the cold truth: "it's just not meant for you.."

Boss wants to take me off Sunday night news (apparently my newreading sucks, and there were some complaints). Therefore I'm slotted in for the Sunday morning news. So what wrong with Sunday morning? Well, there's church! And the fact that I have problem waking up in the wee hours of morning (but that's not an excuse I know).

The thing is.. my MAIN purpose IS to read news! So if I'm slotted in the Sunday morning news (where they already have their respective anchors to read the news), well bingo! Mission failed. Therefore working on Sunday morning defeats ALL my purposes. It'll be just for the sake of money which I find pointless! Personally, I need to be driven by PASSION. Imagine being so miserable on Sunday mornings (the whole day would be wrecked anyway) just for 120 bucks! Is it really worth it?? Yes, it also cuts down my precious weekend at home, as the travelling up and down is crazy, thus interrupting my quality time home.

At the end of the day it really boils down to VALUE VERSUS WORTH (taken from Confessions Of A Shoppaholic - haha). Time for some serious re-evaluation: "what makes ME happy?" Money? Already my pay is PEANUTS! Minus 500 is close to not earning enough to cover my expenses. Not good either.

Well do you think I'm mad to forgo the offer and put my faith to test??

My heart says: go church. My head says: no money.

My heart says: but I don't like to do Sunday mornings, in fact, I HATE IT.. My head says: do whatever it takes to get the job done!

But my heart says: NO PASSION, my head says: BUT IT'S MONEY!!!

Depressed, oppressed, suppressed, unable to express!

Bottomline is.. everything else doesn't matter anymore if I don't get to read news. I don't know if I have stressed enough that: if I don't get to read news, I'll be so miserable thinking I'm a step backward and NOT forward. In fact, I DON'T want to be reminded of THAT by taking the job on Sunday mornings! I DON'T want to be reminded of my defeat. Future seems bleak now. My dream of being a newsreader is farther and farther away... It breaks my heart. Really.

But deep down inside, I think I already know the answer. Time to listen to the whispers of my heart. It may be filled with uncertainties that's for sure, but I know my heart will be at peace. This is the part where I put my faith to test.

Let go. Let God.

Rainbow Garden

2009-03-29T01:22:00.002+08:00

Twas the month of March and I've never been so busy! Let's see.. I have officially moved up to Jalan Ipoh, KL i.e. stay closer to work so that I don't have to spend most of my time traveling to the other end of the world (or just another lame excuse not to drive my drunk ass home). And yes I'm now officially a city dweller! Yipee! Pigeon hole as it may seem, my room is comfy and good enough to sleep (well that's what I do there most of the time anyway). Fell in love with the place when I first found out the name of the area; Rainbow Garden. How hippie does that sounds? So me right?!? Sunshine in Rainbow Garden. Next thing is to grow a poppy plant at my balcony and throw some "happy" party up my place! Weeeeeeee... And my housemates, they are just awesome lah.. English teacher and BM teacher. Perfect.

Mr. Megalomaniac

2009-03-23T22:33:00.002+08:00

HE talks too much about himself until I was speechless! Often times I was lost for words. Hardly asked about me. And he had the nerve to put his tongue into my mouth! Euww.. Definitely NOT the one I want.

I want a guy who treats me like a princess, makes me laugh, pampers me, spoils me silly and takes care about me. Makes me happy, relaxes me. Neither easy, sleazy nor selfish. Basically treat me like a queen or else he's just not that into me!

Taken from the book "He's Just Not That Into You" (a movie about it coming soon!) where one part, a reader writes about her situation she's facing related to dating guys, and it sound just a bit waaay too familiar...

***

Dear Greg, (the author)

I've been on three dates with a guy who's a really great catch. He's a journalist (well not really in my case) who has an incredibly exciting life - he travels, goes on adventures, and has incredibly interesting observations about it all. He's also really funny (nah). He compliments me and seems to like me and keeps asking me out. He always says he's had a great time with me (uh huh..) But in fact, in the three dates we've had together, he actually hasn't asked me one question about myself (hell yeah, right on!). He's obviously really into me otherwise why would he keep asking me out and telling me how nice I look? Maybe this is what it's like dating exciting guys. He's a great catch, Greg!

Ronda

***

And this was Greg's reply to Ronda's letter in his book "He's Just Not That Into You"...

Dear Captive Audience,

You are so lucky to be with such an exciting guy. You get to watch him perform conversational masturbation on you (err..). Hot. He's clearly as impressed with himself as you are. I hate to tell you this, but he's just not that into you; he's into how you look listening to him (ouch!). When I met my wife, all I wanted to do was ask her questions. How else was I going to know what she's all about? Yes, I like telling her my story too - I wanted to impress her with feats of glory - but it was an even exchange, because I thought she was the catch. When two people are connecting, they hunger for information about each other, a sliver of what life is like when you're not together, a glimpse into their past, a peek into their mind, all in hopes of getting under their skin. This guy sounds like a megalomaniac. At the very least he should be asking you what kind of underwear you're wearing (LOL!)

Be Courageous

2009-03-15T13:22:00.001+08:00

Your view on yourself:

Other people find you very interesting, but you are really hiding your true self. Your friends love you because you are a good listener. They'll probably still love you if you learn to be yourself with them.

The type of girlfriend/boyfriend you are looking for:

You like serious, smart and determined people. You don't judge a book by its cover, so good-looking people aren't necessarily your style. This makes you an attractive person in many people's eyes.

Your readiness to commit to a relationship:

You are ready to commit as soon as you meet the right person. And you believe you will pretty much know as soon as you might that person.

The seriousness of your love:

You like to flirt and behave seductively. The opposite sex finds this very attractive, and that's why you'll always have admirers hanging off your arms. But how serious are you about choosing someone to be in a relationship with?

Your views on education

Education is very important in life. You want to study hard and learn as much as you can.

The right job for you:

You're a practical person and will choose a secure job with a steady income. Knowing what you like to do is important. Find a regular job doing just that and you'll be set for life.

How do you view success:

You are afraid of failure and scared to have a go at the career you would like to have in case you don't succeed. Don't give up when you haven't yet even started! Be courageous.

What are you most afraid of:

You are afraid of things that you cannot control. Sometimes you show your anger to cover up how you feel.

Who is your true self:

You are mature, reasonable, honest and give good advice. People ask for your comments on all sorts of different issues. Sometimes you might find yourself in a dilemma when trapped with a problem, which your heart rather than your head needs to solve.

http://www.quizbox.com/personality/test82.aspx

V-day : "We" Day

2009-02-15T12:52:00.001+08:00

2 is a couple,
3 is a company,
more than 4 is a family!

Love is definitely in the air...

Flowers : Check
Chocolates : Check
Significant other : ???

Celebration of self-love

2009-02-14T17:11:00.000+08:00

"It's Valentine's Day and I survived the mall!!!"

2 hours of shopping at Sunway Pyramid (which I thought would be dreadful cause it's VALENTINE'S and so suck-y for singles to go out where couples are seen together holding hands, hugging, with flowers, gifts, etc)... turned out to be not so bad after all! I'm glad to know I've grown out of that dreadful V-day thought and embrace life as a single person. In fact, it is great to be single! I know what you are thinking: "only losers say that..." but heck guess what? I honestly don't care what the hell YOU think. I'm living MY life. Somethings I've learn about myself this V-day:

1. Self-dependent
It's good to know that I can be HAPPY just being with myself. Mind you, I was out there shopping alone (which I actually enjoyed) in a crowd of mostly couples (cause it was V-day, and they were selling flowers, teddy bears and chocolates everywhere!). Point is, I did not feel bitter, sad nor depressed. Indeed, I enjoyed being my OWN companion. Which goes to show that I can happily stand on my own two feet. Hurrah!

2. Self-indulgence
What better way to indulge on V-day but with CHOCOLATES! Not just chocolates mind you, but Cadbury Chocolates from the UK! Thanks to Keith, I had the best-est chocolate indulgence (better than orgasm). The bad news: there is no turning back once you have had UK chocs. No more local chocolates for me, now that I've tasted heaven! Mmmmmmmmarvelous!

3. Self-reward
Shopping IS the best reward. Bought something I like for myself: CLOTHES. Got a pretty black satin top at a bargain. So proud of myself! Besides you know what they say... "when you look good, you feel good!" To top of my shopping experience, I got my happy dose of J.Co Donuts! My must haves ALL the time: Chocolate Banana & Peanut Butter! And today instead of Chocomint, I tried the other heavenly beverage, Caramelite! *slurp slurp* Mmmm.. delicious!

4. Self-discovery
I suck at bowling. BIG TIME! Earlier in the morning we had a bowling tourney among media. No extra points for guessing who was the loser. I was ranked among the top-10 LOWEST! It was the "longkang" for me most of the time - not even one strike! Horror sight indeed. Nonetheless, I had a great time trying NOT to throw the ball into the "longkang" and of course had a fun time bonding with fellow team mates (colleagues) and media friends. My unlucky strikes turned out otherwise as my number 004 (Chinese believe that 4 is unlucky number: "sei" also means "die" in English) was called out for a lucky draw and I won a rice cooker. Cheh!

5. Self-love

"I decided long ago, never to walk in anyone's shadow,
If I fail, if I succeed,
At least I live as I believe,
No matter what they take from me,
They can't take away my dignity,

Because the greatest love of all,
Is happening to me,
I found the greatest love of all,
Inside of me,

The greatest love of all,
Is easy to achieve,
Learning to love yourself,
Is the greatest love of all... "

Song: "The Greatest Love Of All" by Whitney Houston.

That would be my V-day theme song this year. To remind myself, I need to love myself, before I can love others. Self-love is not "selfish" or bad. When you love yourself, you will feel good about yourself, and you will feel better about the world. Thus this will make it easier to give love to others. Learning to love yourself may be the greatest love you ever experience and achieve!

Sigh

2009-02-09T17:18:00.002+08:00

Pretty boys but none for me..

Cutest of the bunch!

"I spy a cute guy..."
First question that comes to mind these days: "Is he gay?"

Life is unfair ain't it? Gay or idiots. Which do you choose? The former is just perfect. Well-mannered, gentleman, intelligent, fun and caring. The latter is self-absorbed, full of himself or just plain jerk. Is it true then what they say that; GOOD men are either married or gay? Well I guess not ALL hope is lost. If you can't get him as your boyfriend, at least you have him as a good friend. Someone who you can take shopping with and talk about boys. But I'm slowly losing patience.. as the fishes are getting lesser and lesser in the sea!

Absolut-ly sinful

2009-02-09T03:16:00.002+08:00

I love cocktails. But problem is I'm always my own designated driver which kinda sucks. Meaning I can never get drunk due to the fact that perhaps I stay like the other part of the world where nobody lives nearby and I, yes me, myself and I have to send my own drunk ass home. But then again, like I said, I never seriously got drunk before. Very responsible right? Or probably just due to high alcohol tolerance level? Hehe.

Cocktail party Absolut-ly rocks!

Mini Absolut's

Absolut "Bling bling" Vodka

*gasp!* Cocktail Bible?!??

Generally I like sweet cocktails. The dangerous ones are the ones where you don't taste much liquor and 2 hours later *BAM!* The yummy lychee drink intoxicated with alcohol (done at Keith's) still remain tops. Don't know it's name as it was homemade by his air stewardess friend. Having a bar at home is the bomb as you can mix and drink as you like. And of course get wasted. Apple+mango vodka is also T.D.F! I prefer cocktails to wines anytime as I find wine too dry/heavy for me. For the meantime, I'll just stick to sweet and yummy cocktails, thank you!

Wines are better for you no?

25+1 Random Things About Me

2009-02-05T20:50:00.001+08:00

1. I used to be part of a group called “Spice-licated” back in high school and we would sing and dance to the song “Wannabe”. Guess which Spice Girl I was?? Baby Spice! The rest of the band were Kamini (Scary Spice), Bee Hwa (Ginger Spice), Hwa Mei (Posh Spice) & Shima (Sporty Spice).

2. I was a HUGE fan of Backstreet Boys when growing up (who wasn’t back then right?). I had the biggest crush on (you wouldn’t believe it) Alexander James McLean aka A.J of the Backstreet Boys! Boy, I had such a weird taste in men back then.

3. Back in high school as well, me and a friend (Bee Hwa) would write to each other exchanging our updates about our imaginary “pop” lives. We lived in POP World, went to the same school as Taylor Hanson, lived in the same apartment block as other pop stars such as Backstreet Boys, Robyn, N’Sync, Janet Jackson, etc. My pop name was Sue Jordan Gabrielle Timberlake (yup I was related to Justin) & was dating A.J! Talk about your wildest imaginations!

4. I would most probably be in Korea right now, if I wasn’t doing what I’m in at the moment (broadcast journalist). Got offered as an assistant chemist in Korean Ocean Research and Development Institute (KORDI). I would have work near the ocean, eat raw seafood, date a cute Korean boy and enjoy “kim-chi” right about now.

5. I’ve always wanted to be a Starbucks barrista (but never one). I think it’s a cool job, serving people with a smile and just make coffee! So fun and carefree.

6. I fell in love with Sabah and everything on the land below the wind. It was love at first stay. Beautiful place, great food, interesting culture and super-friendly people! Never felt so at home. Some people even mistaken me for a Sabahan (I’m like so local okay) because apparently I look and sound like them. But I don’t mind bah ;)

7. I was the captain for an all girls futsal team named "Girl Power" (yeah!). We were up against all the other boys’ team in tuition. Basically we kalah teruk lah :(

8. My motto especially back in campus was “One who is hesitant is lost..” Now? I think too much and wonder about the "what if’s". Sigh.

9. I once represented my college in a swimming competition. FYI, I never swam for competitions (only for leisure) and I wasn’t even good/consistent/regular at it! So I jumped into the pool and realized I couldn't feel the floor as the starting point was middle of the pool. I panicked, almost drowned and raised my hand. Nobody came to my rescue though. Instead everybody cheered me to swim to the finishing line. Once I reached the end, I got thunderous cheers and applaud. Of course that was the most embarrassing moment of my life.

10. I’m afraid of depths (no wonder I failed #9). Whenever in pool, I rarely swim vertically. I rather swim in horizontal lines. Whenever I swim in deep areas, I would fear somebody would grab my feet or get leg cramps and drown. But I’m not afraid of heights though.

11. I have a habit of washing my feet every time before I sleep.

12. I’m fascinated with anything Latin! Spanish, music, salsa, culture, food and hot Latinos :P

13. I once had a HUGE crush on my Spanish lecturer, Senor Caning Jarangmillo from Caracas, Venezuela. I tell you.. he would wear a leather jacket and aviator glasses to class.. and boy was he HOT! I saw him again in a salsa party long after I graduated and finally got the courage to ask him for a dance (yes I ask guys to dance wan). We danced alright but he was clearly drunk/tipsy and he only did mambo ALL the way. So much of hot salsa-ness. Indeed I was CRUSHED!

14. I love polka dots and vertical stripe designs on clothes. I especially like crisp buttoned on shirts with vertical stripes on men ;)

15. I love any form of publicity. In newspapers, radio and TV. I like to listen to my voice on the radio and I would text everyone to listen to it too.

16. I was never allowed to go to school camps when I was younger. My first experience setting up a REAL tent was only recently during a day-trip to PD. It wasn’t even for overnight. Just as shade from the sun. Hmmph!

17. When I was little, my favorite game with my cousins at our grandma's place was "Asia Bagus" aka the singing contest hosted by Najip Ali on TV. The contestants would be Phillip and me, meanwhile Michelle would be judge. I guess it was good practice. Phillip is now a lead vocalist of fourletterstory, his own band.

18. I’ve always wanted to perform in front of an audience. I’ve always dreamt of entertaining people.

19. I have the worst sense of directions. During assignments, my challenge is not so much of finding a story but more of finding the location!

20. I have not a single teeth cavity. All thanks to mom who took care of them when I was younger. I was banned from taking sweets. But now, I have a sweet tooth.

21. I’m actually a shy person. I only open up and “shine” with people whom I’m comfortable with. I prefer to listen rather than talk and I like to observe people. I would look at their hair, shoes, and bags and how they carry themselves. I suck at making small talks. Really. I’m jealous of people who can strike a conversation with just anyone while talking just about anything!

22. My dream job is to be a TV newscaster. I would love to work with TV (I mean in front of TV). Someday.

23. My colleagues call me “Cina Murtad” (means lost Chinese?) because I don’t speak Mandarin/Cantonese nor mix well with my kind.

24. I’m quite fickle at times. When it comes to shopping I’ll go the shop several times before I decide on the purchase. I tend to shop based on instincts, as it has to feeeeeeel right.

25. I have a must-sing-song during karaoke sessions. It is “Gemilang” by Jaclyn Victor. My version is the *grrrrr* one. Karaoke with me to find out!

26. Oh I find guys that I like tend to have gay tendencies. Damn it! I dunno if it's because of me or what? Nah, I guess it's just true what people say: GOOD men are mostly either married, or GAY.

CLEO

2009-02-03T01:15:00.001+08:00

Cleopatra... eat your heart out! :-O

(Don't) Kiss Me

2009-01-29T20:20:00.001+08:00

Kiss me beneath the milky twilight.
Lead me out on the moonlit floor.
Lift your open hand.
Strike up the band and make the fireflies dance,
Silver moon's sparkling.
So kiss me.
So kiss me.
So kiss me.

*zip it*

But I won't let you kiss me...

- because we hardly know each other
- because it's only the second date (and it wasn't even consistent)
- because i don't kiss strangers
- because i don't trust you
- because i feel you're taking advantage of me
- because i feel insecure when i'm with you
- because i feel unsafe (that you would jump on me anytime)
- because it's too soon (if we are kissing on our 2nd date, imagine what happens on the 4th date?)
- because i'm a nice girl & you're a naughty boy ("bad boy, go back to my room now!")
- because i'm afraid you'd dump me after that
- because i might get heartbroken
- because it was at the cinema (supposedly comedy but it wasn't at all funny)
- because it wasn't even a romantic date
- because i would have rocked your world if you have waited around
- because you haven't earn it yet, honey
- because i need you to like me (not like to get inside my pants or mouth)
- because it's lust not love
- because you kept talking about it (now that freaked me out)
- because you are horny
- because i'm not cheap nor trashy (although i recycle)
- because you have a girlfriend? duh.
- because you are not my boyfriend
- because i need you to respect me
- because it doesn't seems right
- because it doesn't feel right
- because you don't deserve it
- because i deserve better
- because i'm worth it ("maybe it's Maybelline...")

I know I'm right and I should not feel guilty nor sorry for myself. I may have high standards, but this is MY life. Why should I settle for something less? The theory is that every date brings you closer to the right guy. Therefore the mission is to date 1000 guys *faint*

or die a virgin *huarghh*

Pink

2009-01-28T21:29:00.001+08:00

is the colour of PASSION..
and my new hair!

Palate's Playground

2009-01-27T00:11:00.001+08:00

Scrabble + Makan = Fabulous --> Scrabbulous!

It feels like home here. Well technically it is a "home-turned-chic-makan-place" called Palate Palette. Except mom wouldn't allow me to graffiti my wall so artsy-fartsy like them. Love the ambiance. Love the food. Love the drinks. This cute chair with fairy wings attached was particularly inviting. One cannot help but feel gay (I meant happy) dining here.

This chair is so me!

This one has been one of my fave makan & hang out spot. Not my first time but with different company most times. Well me thinks Palate should give me commission for introducing the place to my friends! I'm very tempted to skip to desserts but let me tantalize your palates with the main course first...

No, not this one..

Clockwise from top left: Chicken Lasagna, Chicken Chop, Ginger Creme Brulee & Dark Chocolate Cheese Cake

Chicken Lasagna with leek bechamel (trust me, I have no idea what leek/bechamel is, but it's good)

No, it isn't beef either. It's chicken chop with corn & ratatouillie (apparently that's a name of a vegetable dish & not a rat!)

And here comes the most anticipated part: desserts! The highlight this time has got to be this baby, Dark Chocolate Cheese Cake! T.D.F = To Die For! Rich cheese cake covered with dark chocolate sauce. Not too cheese-y as it was perfectly balanced with the slightly bitter dark chocolate. Scrumptious!

Perfect cheese + choc combo!

Oh I just can't resist!

Would definitely consider throwing a party here especially upstairs where it's oh-so-gorgeous. Even more artsy-farty walls/decor/paintings with cuter chairs/lounging areas. Perhaps my next year's birthday which falls on 10-10-10. It has to be special ehh?? *fingers crossed*

Dessert hunting!

2009-01-10T00:50:00.001+08:00

Fresh apple tart with cinnamon

Initially the plan was to catch Comedy Thursday at Little Havana, however it turned out to be FULL HOUSE! Bummer right? Just when you wanted a laugh or two. So had a changed of plans. Since we were at the infamous Changkat Bukit Bintang, we went to satisfy our sweet tooth cravings for scrumptious desserts instead! After walking down the whole street checking out interesting menus along the street with many dining places (literally from Little Havana to Palate Palette), we finally decided on twentyone kitchen+bar. Not long after we sat down inside its uber cool interior and nice sofas, I suddenly realized I just ticked off the list of one of my to-dine-places. Yipee!

Raspberry chocolate tart with chocolate mousse and ice cream!

Gosh I just love desserts. This time it was really just desserts session as we already had dinner much earlier. So it was really enjoyable. Unlike the usual dessert-come-right-after-main-meal, which leaves you overly full till you can't enjoy the best-est part of all, even though sometimes you have the "special desserts compartment" in your belly. *burp*

Desserts mania

Strawberry Long Island

Oh the cocktails were good too. Since too many to choose from, I just asked for recommendations and the waiter suggested Strawberry Long Island. Sounds familiar? Yeah it's fresh strawberries blended into a classic mix with four white spirits. Do I sound like a liquor expert or what? Nah, I'm no alchoholic. I just check out their website. Duh.

Flat white

All good things/meals are completed with a good coffee. Had a good chat over desserts and drinks and coffee (not me). Meanwhile we were indulging downstairs, upstairs was actually a fashion show going on with 'em funky disco music. So it kinda felt like clubbing at the same time. But more like mouth and palate clubbing.

Mmmmm... scrumptious!

The cost? About RM110 for two. Just desserts and drinks, mind you. Well first of all, I would classify this as fine dining. So yeah it's a bit on the expensive side. But thankfully I didn't have to pay for it. Ahh sweet!

2008 The Year Of Oppurtunities

2009-01-04T14:44:00.001+08:00

Traditionally every year end I'd like to reflect on what that year has meant to me. Something to look back and pen down my experiences, in a way to treasure the moments as they don't come anytime and every time. Something I'd like to remind myself: "You only live life once.." Naturally, live life to the fullest! I guess I'm a person who get excited easily.. about life. Well am still finding out about myself in life (aren't we all?). If 2007 was the transition year for me (i.e. transition from being a student to a working adult), then 2008 would be the career year for me. Not so much in building a career or climbing some corporate ladder, but more like laying the bricks one at a time in this line I never thought I'd be in; jounalism.

"This is Su Lin, reporting LIVE from the red carpet for the MTV Asia Awards 2008 held at Genting Arena Of Stars..."

2008 would be the significant year when I first started reading live news on radio. Starting from the month of May 2008 if I can still recall, after I got into a car accident (first time as well) with my brand new MyVi. On a lighter note, what my boss commented to that car accident that was to "buang suey" as I finally get a chance to read news. Something that I've always wanted to do. Thankfully as bad as my news reading skills are, I'm still given the oppurtunity to read news weekly as I needed the pratice badly as well as my weekly fix. I needed a platform to grow and reading news is actually quite a challenge as I STILL get nervous/panic attack/cold feet/chills/tongue twisted EVERYTIME I read the news live on the radio. Something totally different from what I expected. The cat never failed to catch my tongue. One could never imagine some or the darnest things I have said (or should I say misread) on air. For one, Bahasa Melayu can be quite a tongue twister. Believe me, when you are on air LIVE, things could be really BAD. If I could compile a book that says "The Darnest Things To Be Read In News" would be; "menguntungkanG" (meaning: to give profit), instead of reading it as "menguntungkan". Other tricky words I never fail to stutter are "tertentu" and "siasatan". It would sound like "tttttttttttt-tertentu" or "sssssssssssiasatan". Thankfully when I listen back it sounded more like a audio technical error rather than a human error! Malay names are also quite tricky, especially royalties. My God, I had quite a hard time reading the names in one breathe without getting stuck last week when it YDP of Negeri Sembilan passed away. Not to mention I said "Istana Besi" (meaning: iron palace) instead of "Istana Besar" (meaning: big palace). The list are just endless and yes, I am prone to make bloopers. Something that I wish to change for the year 2009. Less bloopers, more confident and dynamics in news reading. A bit far fetched you say? I would love to prove you all wrong.

Something new in 2008: live news reading on weekends!

Year 2008 also saw many of my special reports that made it to the air waves. Most of my story pieces were more prone to health topics and human interests. I enjoy doing special reports, something to call my own. My own voice over and my own story findings. It gives me great satisfaction to hear them play my story on air, as I have put a lot of effort and hard work into them. Even better when someone else takes notice of your work and tells other people about it. Oh yes, I love publicity. Any form of publicity is good publicity! Especially from a radio critic i.e. The Star's Air Raves columnist, Anthony Thanasayan (check out blog link: Air Raves). Thanks to him, when nobody noticed, my work gained some recognition in his columns. THEN only people (including my boss) started noticing my works. One of them which was the special featured story on Talasemia, that was nominated for the Angkasapuri Award in RTM. Nominated as finalist only but didn't win. Better luck in 2009!

BJ: Broadcast Journalist (NOT b**w j*b)

2008 was a pretty awesome year to work in. Haha. Gosh, who am I kidding man?!?? One of the more glamorous highlights were the MTV Asia Awards 2008 at Genting Highlands where I was there to cover the event and at the same time up close and personal with famous international stars i.e. The Pussycatdolls, Leona Lewis, Panic At The Disco, The Click Five, The Script, One Republic, and (ohh la la) the delicious host, Jared Leto! Well that was more fun and fluffy news. The more substantial events covered was the 12th General Election in Sabah (super duper great time!) and The Royal Commission Inquiry into Lingam's controversional tape (super duper stress time!). Those were the memorable ones I can recall for 2008. No so much on the contents of what was being reported, but pretty much of the wholesome experience gained from it. General Elections in Sabah opened my eyes to the political and social scene in somewhere remote but yet so close to heart and at the same time I get to TRAVEL! (honestly speaking THAT IS the best-est part). Meanwhile the Lingam court reporting stint was pretty heavy stuff, but at the end of the day it feels great to be part of something important at the same time controversial (read: the inside scoop and all the adrenaline rush).

The U.S Presidential Elections Watch: "Obama Boleh!"

Well 2008 was not ALL about work. Gosh, don't I just sound like a workaholic or what? Work work work. Bleh. Well one thing for sure, I got bitten by the travel bug that year. In a year alone I have already travelled to Bangkok TWICE! With only a 2 months of gap. It's crazy I know, but I like it! Whereas Singapore was the year end countdown experience. My first time joining revellers ushering in the new year in a foreign country. Anticipating the countdown and watching fireworks from near at The Esplanade hanging out with The Merlion. Meanwhile my work took me to Sabah, as well as my roadtrips to food tasting in Malacca, (even more in Penang) and water-rafting in Kedah! Well at this moment I could only afford visits to 3rd world and neighboring countries and only domestic travel. Sigh. No money, no honey. I would love to see the world. Someday.

"I'm leaving on a jet plane..."

So what else did I found out about myself in year 2008? That is: I'm not a gym person. Signed up for Fitness First membership for a year. Barely 3 months into it, I froze my membership. Passport membership, mind you. My excuse? My feet hurts. Auwww... Lame right? Ironically, my kaki sakit (from a previous leg injury) but still can go for salsa *grin* I admit I lack discipline in keeping my weight in check. Gym is fun (once in awhile), but it be committed to it everyday, it becomes like a relationship. Wtf. Just because I paid for it, therefore that's my "motivation" to gym. Well plan backfired there. Boo hoo. Instead of heading to the gym, there I was visiting the diners and new places to try out good yummy food! Muahahaha.. As a result, 2008 is also known as the FAT year. So much for new year's resolution to loose weight!

One of my other awesome-est experience in early 2008 was going to a rock concert for the very FIRST TIME! Not just any rock band, mind you. It was Switchfoot live in KL! A little late bloomer you can say, but Switchfoot can rock my socks off anytime baby! Even when I'm 60 years old (with my wheelchair, false teeth and all). Man, the concert was well invested indeed. 2 hours plus of pure solid rock and fans jumping and singing along to all their songs. Great band, great songs, great lyrics, great showmanship. Everything was just GREAT. Two thumbs and another two toes UP!

I heart Switchfoot!

Now that 2008 has closed it's chapter, I wonder what 2009 would bring. Would it bring more challenges or opportunities? Well, it depends on how you look at things really. With challenges comes opportunity to grow and be wiser. I do hope for the best in 2009, although many said it may not be a good year i.e. economically and politically in the current world scenario. Whatever it is, God give me the strength and willpower to live my life to the fullest as life is too short to worry and be sad. Initially, my new years resolution for 2009 is to loose weight (same resolution for the past 5 years) but I think this time I think I want to be more independent. Emotionally, financially and basically just grow up to be a big girl who can take care of herself by herself. Now that's my new year resolution.

Best Damned Thing

2009-01-04T14:03:00.001+08:00

BBQ Marshmallows!!!

Burnt and crispy on the outside, soft melted sweet gooey marshmallow in the inside.

Worst train ride ever!

2009-01-02T22:56:00.001+08:00

I cannot sleep with lights on, noises and movements.

Found out during the train ride down to Singapore. It took about 10 freaking hour to reach! Sitting night coach mind you, NOT sleeping (as in night sleeper's bed coach). My worst night coach ever! I tried about 1001 sleeping positions, desperate to find the most comfy spot just to lay my head to sleep but no avail. Too many noise and movement distraction plus the lights were too effing bright. Think I may have twisted some neck/backbone as I twist and turned the night away. Wtf. Next time will take a bus/flight instead. At least cut short the travelling time. Or alternatively, just get the night sleeper's coach! Sleep is important man. 10 hours of sleepless night is no effing joke. I wished I could just to shut my eyes and doze away like the rest of the passangers. But I just couldn't. As a result? Eyes wide shut then next day. Dammit.

No more night sitting train for me please!

Note to self (next time when travelling): In order to increase comfort while travelling especially night coaches, bring along a sleeping neck pillow (at least!), sleeping eye pad (to block out the lights - tried wearing sunglasses, does not work), a fully charged iPod, munchies, water and a book is a must!

Sigh. Can't I just have a private jet next time?

Hilarous Pick Of The Month

2008-12-25T23:53:00.002+08:00

Imitating the 3 Cinabengs from the potrait behind.

"Running the race"

ROTF LMAO!

Izzi Pizza, Izzy On Your Wallet

2008-12-24T15:57:00.001+08:00

Great food: check.

Great service: check.

Great ambiance: check.

Great value: CHECK!

Actually one of the reasons I wanted to try Izzi Pizza at Bukit Bintang, besides being a pasta & pizza freak, is the crazy 75% discount off the menu! Sounds crazy??? Yes, it is CRAZY! It's Izzi's Crazy Credit Crunch promotion! But I don't think that's any of MY problem right? As far as I'm concern, I'm very pleased indeed with all the yummy food & value for my money of course!

Appetizer: Izzi Doughball.

Nothing fantastic lah this one.. We were just greedy! Especially since it's so cheap. Hehe. Me thinks the cheesy doughball would be excellent though!

Clockwise from far left: BBQ Chicken Salad, Prawn Linguine, Fungi Pizza & Spagetti Carbonara.

Tuck in!

Makan lah!

Last but not least, for desserts: Chocolate Dome!

Nothing "dome-ish" about the shape though, however the taste is T.D.F (if you don't already know, T.D.F : To-Die-For!!!). Taste of its rich chocolate coated cake with chocolate praline inside. Taste something familiar to Ferroro Rocher! Simply mmmmarvelous!!! For me desserts are as important as the main meal, if not most anticipated part of dinner. One has to have a special compartment in stomach for desserts I think. Similar to cows with 4 stomachs! And of course, need I say more? Chocolate is the answer... who cares what the question is??!?

The bill. Jeng jeng jeng.

How much? It's only RM48.20 after 75% discount off the exact price of RM124.70! Therefore an average price of RM25 per pax for a complete meal ranging from appetizer right up to desserts including drinks! Blimey, it's crazy alright! I seriously DO NOT know how they are making money with this. But then again that's NOT my problem lah! I would definitely visit there again for their coffee, desserts, read magazines, or just to chillax and of course not forgetting, camwhoring!

Nice sofas and tonnes of magazines!

Not-So-Magnificent Fish & Chips

2008-12-20T15:57:00.001+08:00

The Magnifent Fish & Chips. Sounds corny right? Well, one have to try it out to know whether it stood up to its name. I've heard many reviews about this place which is located in the happening street of Changkat Bukit Bintang. It's Friday and I've been craving for authentic English fish & chips (wrapped in newspaper and all). So invited a few friends for a night of food experimenting!

The fish comes with chips (duh) and tartar sauce. The tartar sauce was a bit of a let down though. Usually besides the crunchy fish & chips, I'd look forward to the tangy tartar sauce. This was nothing close to magnificent. Sigh. Oh you can drizzle some vinegar and salt for the added authenticity and flava!

Me & Tink wacking the Butterfish until oh-so-full-till-we-cannot-move!

Here you have to pay between 20 and 45 ringgit for a single piece of battered fish. But of course, it's quality fish and cooked to perfection! However the batter (or should I say, anything fried with batter) will leave you feeling "too-full" to the extend of nauseatic a.k.a. BM term: "jelak".

The menus are on the walls. Not just fish & chips of course. There are other main dishes as well like Shepard's pie, bangers and mash, mushy peas and beef and onion pie. But if you are in The Magnificent - of course you gotta try the FISH right? There's even a single (wall) menu just for desserts! Hooray! Unfortunately, after having "battered" by the battered fish and oily chips, one is too full to have desserts. Even my special tummy compartment specially for desserts have battered fish inside. Euww...

Ped's Parrot Fish that went inside the worm-hole.

Hawa with Shepard's Pie + Green Peas = good girl.

Lalala Birthday-lah!

2008-11-25T23:55:00.001+08:00

24 marks the spot ;)

Nah, my birthday was more like a month ago. Just got around to post the "lala-ness" of it all. Cheers!

What's in a name?

2008-11-21T00:01:00.000+08:00

What Tansulin Means

You are a seeker. You often find yourself restless - and you have a lot of questions about life.

You tend to travel often, to fairly random locations. You're most comfortable when you're far away from home.

You are quite passionate and easily tempted. Your impulses sometimes get you into trouble.

You are usually the best at everything ... you strive for perfection.

You are confident, authoritative, and aggressive.

You have the classic “Type A” personality.

You are very intuitive and wise. You understand the world better than most people.

You also have a very active imagination. You often get carried away with your thoughts.

You are prone to a little paranoia and jealousy. You sometimes go overboard in interpreting signals.

You are the total package - suave, sexy, smart, and strong.

You have the whole world under your spell, and you can influence almost everyone you know.

You don't always resist your urges to crush the weak. Just remember, they don't have as much going for them as you do.

You are a very lucky person. Things just always seem to go your way.

And because you're so lucky, you don't really have a lot of worries. You just hope for the best in life.

You're sometimes a little guilty of being greedy. Spread your luck around a little to people who need it.

You are relaxed, chill, and very likely to go with the flow.

You are light hearted and accepting. You don't get worked up easily.

Well adjusted and incredibly happy, many people wonder what your secret to life is.

You tend to be pretty tightly wound. It's easy to get you excited... which can be a good or bad thing.

You have a lot of enthusiasm, but it fades rather quickly. You don't stick with any one thing for very long.

You have the drive to accomplish a lot in a short amount of time. Your biggest problem is making sure you finish the projects you start.

What's Your Name's Hidden Meaning?

Dip Date Dunk

2008-11-14T18:59:00.002+08:00

Initially this was supposed to be a funny story... Turned out to be real and finally I blew it. Tell me what's new right? It happened on the dance floor (few months back). The night was great, I was dancing the night away. He then asked me for a bachata (me like) - it's a slower range of salsa. Body held almost closely, almost cheek to cheek. Lotsa hip movement. So we danced, it was good bachata. Then I heard him whispered to my ear, " How do you feel about a date?"

*GASP!*

Thousand of thoughts raced my mind: "How do I turn him down without hurting his feelings?", "Wow so random, I don't even know this guy!", "Umm... err... ahhhh..."

Then before I could even utter a single word in response to that.... *WHOOSH!* My head and upper body flung backwards and I saw the ceilling. Yup, I was led to a DIP. Then it dawned upon me, he was actually asking; "How do you feel about a DIP?" NOT DATE! Haha. How embarassing!!! Yup, that's me, prone to self-embarassment. And also oh-so-self-absorbed. But it didn't ended there. Several weeks later, he sent me a message on Facebook - asking me out. So it was a DATE after all! How bizzare/hilarious?!??

But sadly that hot date didn't happened. I turned him down cos I freaked out (smacks head). A complete stranger. Sounds interesting and intruiging indeed. But I wasn't comfortable with the thought of going out with a stranger. Although I know the idea of going out on a date is to actually get to know the person better. But what can I say? I freaked out... Shame on me. After that, I have not heard from him ever since. Sigh. Yes, there's a hint of regret. No doubt he seems interesting. Into salsa, Spanish, scuba diving and all that. (P/S: he's a PRO in scuba diving - he teaches them!). We shared few things in common at least. I wonder what would have turned out if I eventually went out with him on that date? Probably by now joined him in some amazing scuba diving excurssion. Therefore the moral of the story is next time, no more freak out.

It's just a date!

Salsa-ween

2008-11-12T14:46:00.000+08:00

The witch, pirate and devil acting very naughty on Halloween!

With Salsa Sam as Jason (from Freddy Krueger) and Aisha as witch with cape and all (not seen here though).

The witch featuring The Devil Wears Prada ;)

No extra points for guessing who we were that night. From (L) to (R): Meet Witch Of The Polka-Dot Land, Medusa and Black Widow!

Salsa + Halloween = great combo of fun and the occassion of my pointed witch hat falling while salsa! Nonethelest, I simply loved the hat -- completed my witch look for the night (except lack of a broom stick). Thanks to Sharmila!

My Chic Bookshelf

2008-11-06T19:31:00.002+08:00

Don't judge a book by it's cover. But this book's cover totally gives and the contents are insightful too. Some of the things you wouldn't thought of, i.e. "why do most of our milk come in the shape of box cartons and not cylinder like fizzy can drinks" and vice versa. Well it's got a lot to do with economics, that's for sure. I wish I had more time to read and enlighten myself with the principles of economics in interesting everyday lives, but I don't have the time -- so I keep it on the bookshelf first.

"Honey, wait for me... Mummy's coming!"

Well there was a promotion at Borders, 3 books for the price of 2. How good does that sound? So I grabbed these other two. By now, you would have noticed the books I dig aren't exactly found in the fiction area. I don't really read fictions, if I'm looking for fiction, I would watch a movie. As I rather invest in self-help books that are timeless and helpful. Duh. Haha. However the sad news is, they too are waiting for me from the bookshelf, staring at me, screaming: "READ ME!!!"

Ahh... A Year In High Heels. This one is relatively new (the other 3 books were bought months ago!). Yes I admit I'm guilty of buying more books when I haven't even finish with the previous three. But it's so cute! All year round guide to fabulous-ness.. in high heels. Plus it has even a foreword written by Manolo Blahnik!

Jeng jeng jeng... I'm currently reading this! The title might sound controversial (definitely self-help). But this time, there is hope as I'm diligently midway through reading the book and not just skipping the pages, or select whichever page I want to read (I always do that to save time -- just read the middle or last part). I'm determined to finish reading my books! Just wishing for the best ambiance and setting to do so: at the beach! Oh how I could only wish... The perfect beach in my mind: white sandy beach, lying in a hammock, under a shady coconut trees, feeling the cool ocean breeze, while sipping my yummy pina colada, and hubba-hubba-ing at cute hunk-alicious guys (as eye candy) and of course reading A GOOD BOOK!

Yay for Obama!

2008-11-05T18:48:00.000+08:00

That's me posing with "Obama" during the U.S. Presidential Election Watch!

WASHINGTON, Nov 4 (Bernama) -- Barack Obama won the US Presidential elections beating John McCain in a landslide victory to become the 44th President of the United States.

Obama made history as the first black president in a long-fought battle of almost 2 years.

It was a bitter sweet moment for Obama whose grandmother, described as the rock in his life, died early Monday in her hometown of Hawaii.

At press time, Obama secured 338 electoral votes compared with McCain's 156. A candidate need only 270 electoral votes to win the presidency.

The President-elect is expected to give his victory speech at 12 midnight to a throng of crowd in Grant park, Chicago, Illinois.

The 47-year-old Obama and his running mate, Sen Joseph Biden of Delaware, will take their oaths of office as president and vice-president on Jan 20, 2009.

Obama will move into the Oval Office as leader of a country facing economic challenges and fighting wars on two fronts -- one in Iraq, the other in Afghanistan.

-- BERNAMA

Current Cravings

2008-11-02T21:08:00.000+08:00

I want this...

Roti Hawaii

and this...

Claypot Loh Shu Fun

...at Sri Murni, SS2. Somebody staying in PJ area, please take me there!!! I want to makan sedap-sedap :)

Memoirs of the forgotten blogpage

2008-10-17T19:56:00.000+08:00

Simple and very amatuer-ish indeed my first attempt in blogging back in 2006. Can hardly manage to keep it updated. So never bother about it anymore. Looking back at the blog, it does bring back memories of previous experiences of penning down my thoughts and so-called-life. Therefore, this is a blog post in reminiscent of the other, forgotten blogpage. Not to mention it belongs to Friendster. How lame! Reading back the blog posts, they are quite funny and lame as well. Involving several stages of life: campus, intership in a chemical factory and of course, boys. Naturally.

However the most memorable of penning down my campus experience has to be how dreadful my first year or rather all THREE years surviving my major in Chemistry was. To summarize it: "I had no chemistry with Chemistry." Enough said.

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

Italian Horoscope (delayed..)

February 4th, 2007 by sunshine-sulin

Okay.. So why was this blog not posted again? This is why i hate blogs. Guess i have to post it AGAIN. Oh bummer! Here it goes.. Blog that was supposed to be posted up 2 weeks ago:
I just tried out this Italian Horoscope my friend sent me, which i found out to be quite true *gasp* I was born in 10/10/1984,which classified me in this group:

Group E5 You are found to be a person who loves to love (show me some love, baby..)You prefer emotional decision more than mental decisions (mentally unstable??)You consider life just to enjoy; you are the one who is perfect to call FLURTIES (say what??? Oh u mean FLIRT-ies???).

You love to increase the list of your friends and beloved (haha, you mean in Friendster? Yeah definitely.)You have a number of dreams but you never work hard to make your dreams come true which is the biggest drawback in your nature you take everything much lightly.

Shockingly true +_+

Like someone said to me today that as long as your on a medium stage (meaning this don’t come too easy nor too hard) you tend to remain as you are. Well it’s been like this for a long loooong time. I guess it’s time to change. I’m hoping for a change. I’m talking about my future. Being a science student for all this while (read: chemist) is no fun. I guess i’ve been deprived of being into mass communication field for so long that i’m yearning for a taste of it. I’ve been in science stream all my studying life (including STPM) so the natural and safe thing to do was to pursue a science course in university. But the truth is my heart yearns to communicate with people in the media NOT to communicate with lab apparatus that don’t speak back! Yes, i wanted to be a mass comm student, but decision was made, right or wrong neverthelest it’s all history now. I had to put that dream on the shelf and do what i’m doing now. I know i whin A LOT about my course, but this is my last semester so bear with me. Haha.

Hmm.. that would probably explain why i’m always seen in the Faculty of Modern Language and Communication like ALL the time. Come to think about it, it’s true! 1st year:dj at Putra FM, the studio was there so i HAD to sign in every week. Then 2nd and 3rd year there was the multi-language electives (Spanish and German) and this semester i HAD to book rooms over there for debates and of course had our debate trainings there. Gosh i can’t believe my live revolved around THAT faculty as well (besides my own faculty of course, Faculty of Science) That’s why Yune calls me "a wannabe Mass Comm student". I’m actually flattered. Haha.

So i’m actually a university student with two campus lives: geeky+goody science student with a chemistry major AND a funky+colorful mass comm student wannabe (i believe i’m qualified that title coz i spend as much time in THAT faculty as the real mass comm students AND most of them can’t even communicate!)

Bah!

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

I find this particular post rather funny though. I must say I am quite a complainer, aren't I? Well, what are blogs for then? When your friends don't wanna hear you bitch, you vent it on the PC keyboards. Haha.
Oh well, the blogpage still exist somewhere in the worldwide web at http://sunshine-sulin.blog.friendster.com/

Now that we're reminiscing about old blogpages, how about the ole Friendster?

http://profiles.friendster.com/sunwillshine

Nah save it. It's history. Facebook is the new Friendster.

However I still prefer the older version of Facebook though. The new one's too messed up! Pbbffft!!!

Simply Berry-licious!

2008-10-06T16:20:00.000+08:00

Victoria's Secret Berry Kiss Body mist... It was love at first scent. My current squeeze. I want it... I'd like very much to smell like a delicious raspberry please??

I mish kitty...

2008-09-24T00:05:00.000+08:00

Been thinking of kitty the whole day. Remembered of the short and sweet memories we shared. The laughter, teasing and umm...umm... yeah.. Somehow felt sad to be reminded of the things I want badly but cannot have. Things that could never come to pass. And that includes kitty. It's not about the catch really, just the chase and whatnots. However can't help but to associate the thought to one of those episode drama of "you can have the body, but not the soul" kind. Well sorta. But then again, it is not possible. Why??? Because it's complicated.

Maybe right person, wrong time? Ok, not that right either. To quote a good gay guy friend who once said, "in your eyes, he can do no wrong..." Who am I kidding huh? I guess I want it all for the wrong reasons, which is why I can't seem to have it. Well, who said life is like a bed of roses??? Screw him.

Mum said, "Don't play with fire..." Didn't realized the gravity or seriousness until being pointed out. She does have a point. Really. Mothers are always right eh? Will be more careful next time. Guard your heart at all times. Sometime I build walls around me, so that people care enough will make an effort to climb over. What a fairy-tale story huh? Again living in an illusion of what love should be. Haven't discovered its true meaning. Been blinded by movies and what people want you to believe in TVs. Prince Charming come and swoop you off your feet and whisk you away to happily-ever-afters. Hope is fading, reality is knocking at the door. Maybe there might not be one.

Always falling for the unavailable.

Sigh. Time to look for a new kitty to play with.

*Meow, here kitty kitty kittyyyy...*

Me Simpsonized

2008-08-18T23:13:00.000+08:00

Now how do I look? You go try it.. It's FUN!!! www.simpsonizeme.com.

Tired of complaining about complaining

2008-08-08T13:40:00.002+08:00

LIFE IS UNFAIR, AIN'T IT? YOU WORK SO HARD TILL YOUR ASS ALMOST FELL OFF AND YET YOU ARE PATHETICALLY UNDER PAID, UNAPPRECIEATED, AND WORKLOAD NOT JUSTIFIED TILL IT IS ALMOST IRRATIONAL.

I'm so tired of doing this already. Complaining. I'm tired of complaining about complaining. The problem is, I don't know how to deal with this, which is why I turn to verbal vomitting to vent my frustration. To the extend of annoyance I would say. To the people around me, to myself. Everytime I complain about the same issue, same problem, same people, same screw up. Same shit, different day. Pardon me, when the level of profanity increases, then you know that this is no kidding shit. Excuse my French thoughout this post. I had a bad day, bad week. So bare with me.

I'm tired. I'm confused. And I'm lost. It feels kind of empty inside (echo: "hello...anybody thereeeee??"). One of the crossroads when you stop and ponder (though I wish I have more time for that), due to circumstances in life that rocked your boat a bit thus changing the way you look at things in life. For me, money had never been an issue. Before I started working, I had the most idealistic view on career paths. "Money is not important, as long as you are passionate about your job." It is still true. PASSION IS IMPORTANT. But working life is hard without money. MONEY IS IMPORTANT TOO!

The truth is I'm broke. There, truth hurts. My pocket hurts. Auww.. I'm living from pay-check to pay-check. It's bad you know. It's hard being in the front line and doing most of the donkey work and yet the pay is low. Well people might say it's normal, especially in the journalism world. Over work and under paid. What else is new?

From how I see it, LIFE IS SO UNFAIR! You work so hard everyday going out getting the news and the pay is low, whereas some other people just sit in the office, be part of the office "decorative item" and watch You Tube whole day behind the PC. For that measure of "work", you are being paid way too much. Well, lucky for "that person", I guess. Worst is, for somebody who does so little, should not demand so much from other people. Especially if you don't even have a slightest clue on how the task of a field reporter is, I suggest you to just shut up.

Oh I'd like to see her chasing after the Prime Minister during press conference with those heels and hair. Ugghh... Some people should just remain as decorative ornaments I suppose. You can not imagine what kind of stupidity I have to face and question everytime I'm being throw a ridiculous assignment to cover. I've been asked why do I have to question so much all the time. WELL HELLO, SOME PEOPLE HAVE BRAINS TO THINK. This is what you call THINKING OUT OF THE BOX. I'm TRAINED to ask question. Critical, cynical and sceptical. That's me. Some people especially of higher ranks whom I'd like to call "stuperior", gets really annoyed when his/her authority is being questioned. That is one of the problem working in a HUAN NA company, where they are very hierachy based. But then again that's MY problem. I know I am anti-administrative. I don't take instructions as they are. If I dissagree, I will question. Call me communist I don't care. I get pissed when surrounded by incompetence and people who don't use their brians. The least you could do is provide me with an intelligent answer lah, not "because so-and-so said so." WTF?

I might get fired for posting this, but what the heck, I don't care anymore. Don't be so perasan okay. Siapa makan cili, dialah rasa pedasnya. I'm a cool and easy-going character by nature. So to piss me off to this level, I must congratulate that somebody for stirring so much anger in me. By the way, it's been bottled up for quite some time now. That last threat I got was during the MTV Asia Award coverage. She really went overboard I think. Bear in mind it was ONLY MTV Asia in Genting Highlands, and NOT Permatang Pauh By-Elections, she has been harassing me since day one of event for live crossovers. Problem arose when she wanted a live crossover at the moment where I wasn't even prepared nor settled properly, in the midst of registration, created some drama in the office that I refused to co-orperate. More like she refused to understand. Would a crossover of 2pm and 3pm makes a HUGE difference is a pre-event press conference? Next thing I know, I got a message from her:

-->> sulin, u need to improve on ur reporting... or i will not send u outstation assignment anymore (wtf? I almost blew my top off!)

-->> can u point out which part I shud improve on? I appreciate ur opinion.

-->> we shall discuss this further. not on ym. i need to see u and talk.

Let's ANAL-yse the situation here. What was her motive of sending me such harsh message and not telling me the reason? Why can she not give me clear instructions upon request, why wait so I can "improve" all the better right? I say it is a personal attack. What do you mean IMPROVE IN MY REPORTING? After ONE year, NOW I need improvement? Worst was, I worked my ass off all alone there and not helping was her bitchy-ness. Can you imagine, on the event itself, I gave live crossovers every single hour on MTV updates from 2pm until 11pm. Improve what you say? Improve my ass lah...

Until now she doesn't have my respect. I'm sorry but respect needs to be earned. Don't expect me to respect you when you do NOTHING but be a queen B*TCH and expect to be acknowledge. Sorry naik lorry... I'm still keen to sit down with her and "talk" about how I can improve in my reporting. I'd really like to know. But someone else have to be in the dicsussion to facilitate, otherwise bad aftermath.

Sigh. You see life is NOT a bed of roses. Even roses have thorns. It's either you live with it or worse come to worse, if you can't stand the heat, then get out of the kitchen! The truth is, I do love my job. It's my passion. But I'm having problems with the people, NOT the job. It all boils down to HOW DO YOU HANDLE THE STRESS:

PROBLEM #1: Transport allowance is shitty LOW, barely enough to cover basic car expenses. Fuel price increased and yet still no increament in car allowance. How can??? Make no sense, petrol price increase, but allowance no increase. Obviously WE ARE ON THE LOSING END! And NOW everyday average of 2 assignment (double task, more places to travel, thus more fuel consumption), and yet STILL NO INCREASE. This is ridiculous and irrational. So can somebody tell me the solution to this problem because I am at wits end and I've been raising this issue to my bosses but nobody seems to take heed. Nobody seems to care.

SOLUTION:

a) Beg for money to pay off the car expenses/donation box in office for reporters wellfare.

b) Find a side income: hey, prostitution seems like the easiest and fastest money.

c) Find a better paying job: benefits and wellfare well taken care off. Everybody has a right to LIVE comfortably okay.

d) Marry an old rich man, then inherit all his money after he "accidentally" dies of heart attack/food poisoning/fall of the stairs/bitten by the neighbour's dog.

PROBLEM #2: Office communications. Trust me, I love my colleagues/bosses to the bits. I enjoy working in my office, we are like family. Except for ONE person which I don't like speaking to and can't seem to communicate well with. Enough said. I could go on and on bitching about her. But no, I'm much bigger than that.

SOLUTION:

a) Sit and talk and TRY to find ways to mend the sour relationship.

b) Continue to annoy her until she quits her job (yay!).

c) Allow her to annoy me until I quit.

I STILL DO NOT HAVE THE SOLUTIONS TO MY PROBLEMS. ONLY GOD CAN HELP. IN THE MEANTIME, I MIGHT NEED TO HIRE A FINANCIAL CONSULTANT AND LIFE COACH TO HELP SORT MY LIFE AT THIS POINT OF TIME. WAIT I'M BROKE, I CAN'T HIRE ANYONE. SO, ANYBODY HAS A SOCIAL RESPONSIBILITY TO FULFILL? PLEASE FEEL FREE TO CALL ME.

I'm wishing for...

2008-08-07T00:11:00.000+08:00

A beach vacation

I wish to spend some quality time with just me, myself and I.

Chilling out while reading a good book on a sunny day,

lying on a hammock,

taking shade under the coconut tree and sipping a glass of cold drink (pina colada maybe?)

Oh I must not forget my sunnies and flip flops!

As I enjoy the warm sun on my face and cool ocean breeze,

I can feel the white soft sands beneath my feet.

I'd listen to the waves crashing in and think to myself,

"Ahhh bliss..."

Currently listening to

2008-07-12T16:07:00.001+08:00

Cool Malaysian indie band. I LOVE "STAY"!!!!

Check them out at: http://www.myspace.com/estrellaband

Karaoke anyone?

2008-07-09T15:43:00.000+08:00

So what else is new?

2008-07-04T20:37:00.000+08:00

Muahahaha...

I am a chicken

2008-07-03T12:54:00.001+08:00

Believe or not, these days I'm not as brave as I used to. Back then, in campus, my motto in life was, "one who is hesitant is lost" and "life is too short, so enjoy!". Well, I guess when you grow older and perhaps wider, (opps, I mean wiser!), we tend to allow a lot of things cloud our decisions. In my case, maybe I think too much. Which people might think is good, but I felt worse after that for missing out on the oppurtunities and feeling even remorsed wondering about all the "what if"s. Sigh.

My best example of bravery was the swimming competition back in college. Being a person who hasn't swum much and definately not a natural born swimmer, I signed up for the competition, thinking of swimming just for leisure. Yeah right. Feeling all "gung-ho" and like a wonder woman, I jumped into the pool and I suddenly realized I couldn't feel the floor. So I began to panic. The race was about to began and they instructed me to go to the starting point (which was the middle of the pool). Even swimming to the middle of the pool, I felt exhausted already.

On your mark, get set, go! *whistle blow*

Every participant swam as fast as they could to the finishing line, except for one girl who was still in the middle of the pool. She seems like she's struggling, and almost drowning. She raised her hands to ask for rescue. Then somebody shouted "I think she can swim wan lah..." So they all cheered her to swim on her own to the finishing line. The moment she reached the finishing line, they applauded her for her determination (talk about spirit of sportmanship!) and of course it was the most embarassing moment of her life.

The moral of the story is, one must know their strenght and weaknesses before attempting anything that might make you look stupid or so me-malu-fying. But the truth is, I never regretted the experience at all. No doubt it was really embarassing, but it's something that I would look back and laugh at myself (and of course friends laughing at me too).

But the thing is, I'm just afraid I might not be that girl who would jump into the pool thinking she's a duck anymore. And it kinda terrifies me. Now I feel I'm no longer a duck, but a CHICKEN.

Based on recent experience, I actually chicken-ed out twice on auditions. First was an audition for a theatre play where one have to prepare a 3 minutes monologue. I have always been interested in performing arts, i.e. theatre or anything on stage, so I signed up for a slot to be auditioned. However my first problem was finding the right monologue that suits me. The one which caught me eyes was from the movie "10 Things I Hate About You" where Julia Stiles reads her poem in front of the classroom, then breaks down and cry. Then I realized, "wow, too much drama and emotions, don't think I can pull it off.." And I didn't wanna cry anyway so I decided to select a happier monologue. Still couldn't quite find the right one, I wasn't prepared for the audition, so I called it off. Yeah basically, I chicken-ed out.

Not wanting to give up all hopes left, I settled for a monologue taken from "When Harry Met Sally" (no, not the fake orgasm scene). Even got some tips from a friend who does theatre often to help me in the acting bit. Finally when I was ready (at least I thought I was), I called again to reschedule my audition, but I was told that all slots were already full. Oh bummer. Guess it was not meant to be then.

Today, again I became a chicken. There was an audition for TV host which my friend was involved in. For the audition, you have to stand in front of the camera, introduce yourself as the new host for the show and talk on the specific given topic for about 3 minutes. He told me to try out, even gave some tips of all possible topics to be asked. I saw the questions, and I chicken-ed out. I blame myself for not being knowledgable enough as they were all current issue.

Politik semasa – masa depan BN dalam kemelut politik semasa.

Tuduhan liwat sebagai sandiwara politik.

Apa perlu dibuat dengan Middle Rock dan South Ledge?

Mengapa pertanian Thailand lebih terkehadapan?
Batu putih – pengajaran sejarah yang boleh dihayati.

Kesan jangka panjang kepupusan pelajar lelaki di IPT.
Kaedah menangani kos pengangkutan di luar bandar.
Filem Malaysia tandus nilai.

Suddenly I felt so stupid. I'm so unprepared. I don't have the brains for this! Instead of trying out the audition, here I am missing out on my oppurtunity and studying back the questions, imagining how would I be able to present it to the panel. This really sucks you know. I wish I had more brains for this. Not a chicken brain.

City Of Angels

2008-05-31T23:03:00.000+08:00

Krung Thep Mahanakhon Amon Rattanakosin Mahinthara Yuthaya Mahadilok Phop Noppharat Ratchathani Burirom Udomratchaniwet Mahasathan Amon Piman Awatan Sathit Sakkathattiya Witsanukam Prasit.

That's actually the full name given to Bangkok or Krung Trep, which translates to "Great City of Angels, City of Immortals, Magnificent Jewelled City of the God Indra, Seat of the King of Ayutthaya, City of Gleaming Temples, City of the King's Most Excellent Palace and Dominions, Home of Vishnu and All the Gods".

It was due to King Rama 1, who back in 1782 decided that the name Bangkok was insufficiently noble for a royal city so he gave a much longer name thus making it to the Guinness Book of Records for the world's longest place name ever!

Most locals however, just refer Bangkok by just Krung Thep or "City Of Angels" nowadays.

Nevertheless, I left my heart in Bangkok. Went there on a tour recently, but was kind of frustrated as I had so many things I wanted to do but can't due to time-constraint from the tour itinerary.

SO,

I plan to go back and fulfill some unfinished business. Hehe..

1. Shop till I drop at Chattuchak
2. Visit the Grand Palace
3.Taste authentic Thai food
4. Treat myself to spa
5. Visit friends in BKK

Hope I can do it sometime soon naa!

Sawat Dii Kha...

I heart Bangkok!!!

What is wrong with me???

2008-05-19T16:41:00.001+08:00

As far as I remembered, I have wanted it for the longest time. Almost a year now. Now that I got my one shot at it. I screwed it up. I screwed up once, I screwed up twice, I screwed up three times. And it got me thinking...

"what is freaking wrong with me???"

It's really scary to find out that what you really wished for isn't what you really wanted or probably isn't meant for you in the first place. But you pushed for it anyway because you were in denial and blinded by what you think you want.

So what exactly do you want???

I wanted to read news. Badly. I remember I wanted it so badly for so long. Ever since I stepped into the radio station, I knew what I wanted. Went through ups and downs. Went through self-motivation and self-demotivation. Annoyed my boss all the time. He knew what his annoying-ignorant-naive staff wanted but he said "NO, it's not your time yet". He said Charles Mohan took 4-5 years to get to where he is right now. "So your time will come too..." he said.

Until recently, beginning of this month, I was given a chance. I get to read the news, by assisting the producer in news for the weekend. I was excited and the same time freakishly nervous. I was scared shit. If I blew up this time, no more next time, I thought.. And so will my chance of reading news.

Much to my dismay, it wasn't as easy as I thought news reading would be. It's much harder than my regular live reporting and feature story packages. This was different. The pressure was tremendous and I get the chills whenever I enter the studio. I practically froze, became unnatural and ever-so-conscious about my every single pronunciation. I kept making mistakes, never once I read without making a blooper. Mentioned wrong names on air, wrong pronunciation, you name it, I've done it. The worst part was trying to correct my mistakes on air instead making it sound worse.

It has been 3 Sundays I read the news. Though boss said, "You are only as good as your last read," I did feel that I did slightly better at the third but still it was quite sucky. I STILL made reading mistakes. I do envy my colleagues sometimes. I wonder how can they seem to do it so effortlessly? Could it be they are naturally born talented and I'm not? I have to struggle on my own. I have to put double effort and god, not to mention the pressure I had to go through! It's BAD.

People said probably because BM is not your mother tongue therefore you are not as natural or smooth as others. But to me, that is NOT the reason. I know I can. I believe I can. But at this point of time, I just TERRIBLY SUCK at it. Which brings me to my dilemma. Can something you want so much turn out to be so wrong?

Why doesn't it feel good?
Why can't I seem to get it right all the time?
Why can't I be good?
Why can't I be perfect?

Sometimes I think my boss finally allowed me to read the news just to make me realize that maybe reading news is probably not what I really wanted. So he let me tried it out. He was quite merciful for not telling me off after all the blunders I did on air. He was quite encouraging in fact. Surprisingly. After awhile it gets quite. They say no news is good news? Or maybe they sympathized me. They knew how sucky I must have felt, therefore didn't want to add more to my misery.

Boss said most importantly you gotta love what you do. You gotta have fun. But how can I love what I am doing when it is so flawed? I think I will never be satisfied until I get it right. Nevertheless, I still enjoy what I do very much. Right here, right now. Just that sometimes I want to do MORE. There's so much inside me that wants to come out. I need a channel to express myself; my talents, my thoughts, my desire. My problem now would be enterprising myself. I still haven't figured it out. Maybe because I'm shy? I don't know.

Anyway looking at my performance at news reading, I really don't know what will the future bring. Maybe I'm in, maybe I'm out. This month is supposedly the trial month. Boss said, "you screw up, you are out". Fair enough. But I will not give up. Even if I don't get it. I will try harder next time. I know I'm not born with it, so I have to work harder to achieve my goals. That's just life I suppose. And if you still suck at it. Then probably it's time to reconsider what you really want and move on with the other things that you love to do. But most importantly, it has to boil down to passion. I'm driven by passion.

Passion brings meaning to life. Without passion, it's worthless.

Latest Squeeze...

2008-05-19T15:46:00.000+08:00

Chocolate Avalanche!
It's T.D.F. (to-die-for)

Ahh... Here's a better view of the molten chocolate cake overflowing with vanilla ice cream, hot fudge and cookie crumbles.

The taste??? Mmmmmm.....Marvelous!!!

This is a heavenly-sinful-indulgence...

The dessert menu in Tony Romas is really REALLY tempting. You could eat of the menu. Haha. Just kidding! But seriously, next trip, definitely DESSERTS ONLY. Not that the main courses are bad. Oh no.

Just because I'm a biased dessert lover!!! Haha. Bite me ;-)

What a week it was...

2008-04-26T18:30:00.001+08:00

1. Car got into an accident on Tuesday. Still mourning. Sigh. Whole week had to settle documents at the PJ Police Station. Made a visit there twice this week. Next week STILL have to go there and collect ONE more, before I can settle my car insurance claims. Oh bummer. Till when do I have to drive a dented car???

2. Boss finally said I could read news next month. With one condition I have to be Assistant Producer on Sunday (which means 1 weekend burned) but at least I get read news during that time. Ahhh... an inch closer to what I have always wanted to do. I guess he was right about the "buang suey" part.

"Car got hit, now you get to read news!"

Ok whatever.

3. Kitty went away on Thursday. Gonna miss u kitty... You will always be mummy's favourite kitty. Miss you much I will. Don't be notty notty ya. Hope to see you on YM soon! You still owe me brownies at HRC!

4. Had one too many JCos this week. Wednesday AND Thursday. But that's my favourite. I LURVE JCos!!!!!!!!!! Can't get enough of it baby! Peanut butter, chocolate-banana and anything chocolatey I like! Best served with Choco-Mint beverage. I like it, I like it, I like it!

5. Friday: COURT REPORTING. I hate, I hate, I hate! Sat through 2 hours of boring hearing of the Bukit Gasing development case. Apparently the residents of Bukit Gasing is applying for a stay order to stop development near the area as it disrupts the environment, causes more density to the already dense area, dangerous, etc. Residents versus DBKL. Bottomline: BORING.

6. FINALLY I had the chance to hang out with these kids. DOSE-ians (sounds awful). Haha. After 1 semester man (which is around 6 months?). Can you believe it? It's been that long. We used to hang out like A LOT. Anyway it felt good. Just like good ole days when I was still a student..just like them. Arif was soooo shocked to see me cos everytime it's either just me or him who joined the makan-ing sessions. Hahaha. He had the nerves to call me "akak sulin". Dammit. And also he said he wanted to see how much of an adult I have become. Sheesh. Anyway, we had FUN makan-ing. Our favourite place, Itallianiess. Pasta and pizza. Yummy! And oops, CAM-WHORING of course!!!

The girls.

The boys. Attempting to look sexy. FAIL!!!

Auww...

7. Had so much fun salsa-ing last night. One of the best-est experience. New place, most of my friends were there. Fun but HOT. Haha. Apparently the air-conditioning kinda broke, so people were dancing and sweating! I was so HOT, I had to wipe off my sweat after every dance. Haha. Disgusting right? Apart from that, met a cute Japanese guy who came to visit last night. He's in Malaysia on a business trip. Great dancer. When the night ended, we could have hung out for awhile for a drink or something, but dorky me had o go back and the car was at the opposite direction to where he was headed. So we parted ways. The ending of the night could have been wonderful. Sigh. I'm really bad with this man... No wonder I don't have a boyfriend. Haha. But I got his email though.

*grin*

Oh poor baby ;(

2008-04-26T17:24:00.000+08:00

Got my car into a freak accident on Tuesday. It was a rainy day, at night. As I was driving back from work on Federal Highway, some guy in front of me skidded on the road and bang himself on the road divider. Tough luck. I managed to stop in time to avoid into crashing to his car. Phew. I breathed in sigh of relief. However I wasn't so lucky after all. The 2 cars behind me couldn't stop in time.

CRASH BOOM BANG!!!

I came out of the car and found my baby got hit from the back.

*Ouch! Mommy feel ya...

There's a HUGE dent at the bumper and the boot. Basically I would have to send my car to the workshop and get the WHOLE back replaced.

Anyway, came down from the car to see what had happened. Mind you, it was at night about 8.40pm, raining and I was all alone. My heart was pounding fast. I think to myself, "What should I do??" At that time, what was on my head was that I had to get the plat number of the person who hit me. And of course call home.

"Waaaa.... Mummy...... somebody hit my car....!!!!!!!"

To cut the long dramatic story short, I took down their details and made a police report the next day. Still in the midst of applying to claim insurance. Still pending as the police hasn't made available all the necessary documents. After all is settled, then I can send my car for repair at the workshop. Until then, I have to drive around my car with a dented backside.

Oh it breaks mommy's heart to see you this way...

Somebody told me it is a good experience (since it was my first car accident). My boss laughed at me, and said it is good as it "buang suey". Whatever it is, what I had to go through definitely taught me to be more independent as I had to settle everything by myself.

What doesn't kill you makes you stronger right?

I'm JUNO!

2008-04-18T02:44:00.000+08:00

Yet another interesting movie character test which best suits your personality, which can only be found on Facebook's tonnes and tonnes of applications! And this is my personal fave. Just because I watched the movie, JUNO and liked it! Hehe.

You are JUNO! Maybe you aren't preggers, but you one intense home skillet. You have a unique way with words, and you seem to always express what's on your mind. As far as boyfriends go, Paulie Bleeker is the cheese to your macaroni. You'd much rather kick it old school like Moses and the Reeds, but you adjust to modern technology by having a phone shaped like a hamburger.

The Wild Rose: Random Brutal Love Dreamer (RBLD)

2008-04-17T00:47:00.000+08:00

Erm... that happens to be me. Apparently after being rated by some silly random dating personality test. Oh just one of those things you do to kill time. By the way, you can never believe the results. It says:

Colorful, but unpicked. You are The Wild Rose.

Prone to bouts of cynicism, sarcasm, and thorns, you excite a certain kind of man. Hoping to gather you up, he flirts and winks and asks you out, ultimately professing his love. Then you make him bleed. Why? Because you're the rare, independent, self-sufficient kind of woman who does want love, but not from a weakling.

(hmm...relatively true...ouch! watch out guys!!!)

You don't seem to take yourself too seriously, and that's refreshing. You aren't uptight; you don't over-plan. Romance-wise, sex isn't a top priority--a true relationship would be preferable. For your age, you haven't had a lot of bonafide love experience, though, and this kind of gets to core of the issue. You're very selective.

(oh you mean choosy? damn..)

The problem is them, not you, right? You have lofty standards that few measure up to. You're out there all right, but not to be picked up by just anyone.

(which boils to another MAJOR PROBLEM, not being picked at all!!!)

That's not the end of it. At the end of the test results, it also says:

Always avoid: The Bachelor (DGSM)

(whaaa??? just when you thought a true bachelor will sweep you off your feet...damn it!)

Consider: The Vapor Trail (RBLM)

(wut?? even the name turns me off..now you want me to consider?? get outta here!)

Well that's all the entertainment for tonight. Go ahead and knock yourself out. Have fun and don't take it too seriously...it's just a stupid test.

http://www.okcupid.com/online.dating.persona.test

OMG I'm on a magazine cover!

2008-04-13T02:14:00.000+08:00

......OR NOT!!! Haha. Anyways it's just for FUN ;)

Try it at www.magmypic.com!

Curretly listening to...

2008-04-08T00:29:00.002+08:00

Sara Bareilles "Love Song"! Enjoy ;)

Picture tells a thousand word

2008-04-07T23:31:00.000+08:00

Gosh I'm such a camwhore. My Facebook profile is flooded with pictures. So is my blog. Pictures of me, me and more of me. Call me self-absorbed, but I just love taking pictures (of me). Haha. Camwhoring especially, is my favorite past time and great in allevating boredom, anyplace, anytime.

Say for example your out on a dinner with some friends, then you feel bloated after eating/drinking/talking too much. After some camwhore session, you will be able to continue your bonding session over food. Good as new. Trust me. It's good for calorie burning. All the different pose and stretching of arm and finger clicking the shutter. Hehe. Say cheese.

Most of my pictures are posted on Facebook. I find it most convinient. Not to mention I'm 90% addicted to Facebook, it provides albums you can create and immediately upload them and share with all your friends. Blogging is aight'. But Facebook better. Plus lesser to write as compared to blogging with pictures attached. Mainly because blogging usually depends on my mood. With Facebook, I'm more consistent. So bottom line is....

GO OPEN A FACEBOOK ACCOUNT SO YOU CAN SEE ALL MY CHUN-CHUN PICTURES!

And don't forget to poke me of course ;)

I'M BACK!!!

2008-04-07T23:13:00.000+08:00

IT'S ALIVEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

My lappy of course.

Finally, after sending it to the "doctor" and paid a blardy 200 bucks for a new hard disk and with the streamyx back up, it's finally good as new. So is life. Nah.

So many things to say, so little time, so lost touch in blogging, so blur, so.. so... constipated.

Gosh I gotta use the loo.

Blackberry wonder

2008-03-10T03:26:00.000+08:00

It's a blueberry, it's a strawberry... No, it,s a BLACKBERRY!!! Found out that with a Blackberry, I can Facebook AND blog.Whereever, whenever, whatever! But can't upload pictures here though. And you know what a camwhore I am... So defeats the purpose bah.

Temporary Out Of Service

2008-03-04T19:12:00.000+08:00

Am taking a break from blogging because I'm in Sabah, Land Below The Wind for 2 weeks to cover the general elections. Awesome pictures can be viewed via Facebook http://www.facebook.com/photos.php?id=668316383

Enjoy!